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"If I knew, I wouldn't be so bloody baffled about it," Harry answered, still staring at the dragon in puzzlement.
Eventually the dragon came back down, letting the boys off and staring back at the increasingly puzzled Boy-Who-Lived with amusement.

Sure enough, Eris was among several rather impressive-looking magical gizmos, writing away on a piece of parchment. She glanced up when she heard someone enter the room and smiled, putting her work off to one side by now. "Heya kiddo, Hermione. What can I do for you?"
"Hermione finds my true appearance to be more appealing than my appearance with the glamour up; as such, we were hoping you could figure out a way to let her and only her see through the glamour," Phobius answered.
Eris blinked. "Really? She doesn't find the pointed teeth off-putting or anything? That's surprising - took even me a little time to get used to them. Well, I'll get to work on that, but in the meantime..." She reached into a small chest and pulled out several potions, putting them on an empty table in front of Hermione. "Hermione, I want you to take those. The green potion makes you resistant to all magical forms of mental tampering, the red potion will make it so that you'll skip the "gangly and awkward" phase once you hit puberty and start skipping to the part where you become absolutely gorgeous, and the black potion will give you immunity to Phobius's Aura of Fear. Take the black potion before the green one, or else it won't work. Fair warning, the green potion tastes like boogers, the black potion tastes like blood, and the red potion tastes nastier than any words could ever describe, so I suggest you make sure to have some water or something on hand before you drink them."
Phobius blinked. "...You know, I honestly thought you'd just slip the red one into her food."
"Hell no, that would make the food taste nasty and dilute the potion too much for it to work right."

The dragon seemed to hear that comment, because it only got more amused.
Eventually, Harry could take it no more and walked up to the dragon. "Look, do I know you from somewhere?"
Surprisingly, the dragon nodded.
"Really? Er, sorry to be rude, but exactly how do I know you? I mean, I think I'd have remembered meeting a bloody dragon."
Even more surprisingly, the Firespawn just smirked mockingly and waved one claw, making a noise that sounded suspiciously like "tsk, tsk". It then vanished in a burst of flame, leaving behind... a sticky note?
Harry blinked, picking the sticky note up. "'If you want to know that badly, figure it out yourself - first person to guess my true nature gets a prize'?" he read, blinking once he'd finished. "...Well, that's bloody unhelpful... and disturbing."
"I know, right? It's really freaky," Mitis stage-whispered as he literally stared over Harry's shoulder, scaring the boy witless.
"What the... when the ruddy hell did you get here?!?" Harry sputtered in shock, leaning away from the pyromaniac.
"Just now!" Mitis answered cheerfully.

Eris, having already started on the project proposed, automatically conjured up a comfortable chair for Hermione to sit in, Phobius helping the girl into the chair.

"Nope, he isn't, and no - get points for originality, though," Mitis answered cheerfully, since the dragon was gone. "...And before you ask, yes, Mitis know how he know Minion Scarface, and no, Mitis not going to tell Minion Kitty unless Minion Kitty get it right."
Harry, on the other hand, gave Katherine a baffled look. "Er, Kat? Exactly what made you think that the dragon is my uncle?" he asked in a bewildered tone of voice, honestly wanting to know - did he grow scales or feathers on his back or something?

"Probably, yes," Eris agreed. "Mind potions and body potions generally don't mix well."

"Actually, Minion Boogeyman said his Uncle Sirius lived at different house. Besides, Minion Scarface's parents were too busy hiding from Vol-au-vent to visit anyone, and Mitis and Firespawn only came by 'bout seven years ago," Mitis corrected. "So... no."
"Well, could you at least give us a hint?" Harry asked in exasperation. "I mean, for all we know, he could be my bloody father or something."
Mitis considered this a moment, then grinned ferally, his usual facade of insanity dropped in favor of a more wild demeanor that just screamed "danger".
"When Magic dawned, there were sides three -
The Light, the Dark, and the Primal.
As mankind grew, so did they too,
Until the evolution final.
Then Light and Dark started to war over man
While the Primal sat and watched.
Soon they bound Magic tight,
And then the Primal was lost...
That is, until it poured its knowledge
Into a beastie's head -
Now the beastie seeks to topple
Light and Dark instead."
There was a moment of silence as Harry and Katherine digested that, Harry looking wide-eyed at the supposedly crazy boy, starting to wonder if he was smarter than he let on...
"Mitis hungry! Do Mitis minions have bacon?!? MITIS WANT BACON!!!"
...And then any thoughts of Mitis being more intelligent than he seemed were promptly obliterated right along with the atmosphere Mitis's cryptic little poem had caused, Harry's expression giving way to exasperated incredulity.
Mitis, for his part, just stared innocently back at the two of them, starting to pick his nose with his tongue again... and then there was a slurping sound indicating he was falling back on the Puffskein portion of his heritage and eating his boogers again.

"Occasionally, yes, mostly when she needs a guinea pig for possibly beneficial potions," Phobius answered. "Speaking of which, what are you researching now, Mother?"
"Other than the little project you and your girlfriend gave me, you mean? Well, at the moment, I'm giving the Wild Magic theory another go," Eris answered absentmindedly.

Mitis grabbed the bacon with a nod of thanks and answered, "Only if Minion Scarface fulfills the requirements. Minion Kitty could do it, too, if you willing to pay the price." His gaze sharpened. "Even Nature puts a price on power." Then he returned to his usual crazy look, adding as an afterthought, "Minion Boogeyman can't, though - he too unnatural and have no inner beastie. Can't use Primal Arts if you no have link to nature and/or yous inner beastie."

"Not exactly. The Wild Magic theory... well, the thing is, there is a definite difference between wizarding magic and the magic found in various magical creatures and plants - wizarding magic is controllable but far less powerful, while magic found in nature is far stronger but completely unable to be controlled, hence the term 'Wild Magic'," Eris explained. "The theory is that there is a sort of filter our magic passes through when we draw on it, essentially 'taming' the magic. Theoretically, if one could find a way to remove that filter, they would become far more powerful, albeit at the cost of most of their control and several avenues of wizarding magic, mostly depending on their magical alignments."

(Okay!)

"Something like that," Mitis agreed, "But Primal Arts is whole branch of magic, so it have higher price. Some circumvent it, but you'd have to pay it - Minion Scarface wouldn't have to, though,"
Harry blinked. "Why? What's the price?"
Mitis just stared a moment curiously, then fell over and giggled insanely, obviously finding something hilarious... or because he was bat-s**t crazy, the two seemed to be interchangeable with him... aaand now he was picking his nose with his tongue again.

"Probably, but I'm trying to figure this out one hurdle at a time," Eris admitted freely. "Mind you, Phobius says Mitis managed to remove his filter somehow - neither of them are saying how, though, other than the fact that it's linked to the Animagus transformation."
"I was sworn to secrecy on the matter - something about that being a trade secret and how he'd teach anyone who wanted to know himself," Phobius confirmed, then amended, "Well, it was less me swearing not to tell anyone and more him threatening to spit-roast me and eat me if I spilled the beans to anyone, but the general idea remains: if you want to know, ask him yourself, and if he refuses to tell you, then it's best to accept that and move on."
Eris blinked, looking up to stare at her son incredulously. "I thought you said he was past the whole 'eating sentient beings' phase?"
Phobius shrugged. "He backslides occasionally when provoked; something about not wasting good meat, which I suppose is logical in a faintly disturbing and morbid sort of way."
"I see... why do we keep him around again?"
"One: he's a friend, in a twisted sort of way, two: he's good home security, three: it's better to have someone keep an eye on him as opposed to having him run wild and cause untold damage to everything, and four: do you want to be the one to try and tell the insane pyromaniac with a dragon what to do?" Phobius deadpanned.

At that, Mitis was suddenly upright again, mere inches in front of Katherine's face. "Sanity? Silly Kitty, sanity not cost. No no no, sanity too objective, not a high enough price." He chuckled darkly, then grinned, revealing teeth that were DEFINITELY not that sharp a moment ago. "No mere human can use the Primal Arts and live, for no mere human can control Nature. But Nature is flexible, and so she offers a choice to those who wish to tap into her power: your human body, making you a human trapped in the form of a beast? Or your human mind, turning you into an apex predator in human skin? The choice is yours."

"I haven't said anything he hasn't mentioned already, so no, not unless I provoke him," was Phobius's calm reply.

Mitis nodded, not seeming all that surprised or intimidated. "Fair enough; the Primal Arts aren't for everyone. After all, few people are willing to give up even a small portion of their humanity." With that, he began gnawing on his elbow with a thoughtful look, his teeth now back to being human.
Harry blinked, warily stepping a little closer to Mitis. "Er... why are you gnawing on your elbow?"
"Because Mitis flesh is surprisingly yum-yum, albeit ouchie," was Mitis's cheerful reply before he resumed gnawing, oblivious to Harry sweatdropping.

"Well, Harry strikes me as being the type not to care what sort of present he gets as long as it's heartfelt. As for Katherine, I have no idea, but personally I'm planning on giving her a book on magical creatures in case she decides she wants a magical Animagus form," Phobius answered.