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 Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 8:53 am
Cobra_X iLadyShira-chan [I always wanted a kid too, but now that I'm pregnant and I can't help but be like "WHAT HAVE I DONE!?". Parenting is literally the most terrifying thing I've ever had to go through.
...my wife is a bit further a long then you. We're just about 30 weeks. Not really terrified of being a parent though, but I suppose it's different for men and women. I just know I have great support around me... parents, inlaws, brother/sisters-in-law... plus Im pretty confident in mine and my wife's ability to be awesome.
Looking forward to it really.
But in all honesty, I'm glad it happened. It gave a lot of people meaning. I was starting to become severely depressed again. My boyfriend was heading nowhere in his life fast. And my mother who was diagnosed with breast cancer (the reason I left Gaia) was contemplating suicide because the doctors told her it was terminal.
She gave us happiness, a purpose, and a reason to keep fighting. Even the doctors are amazed by how much my mother has gone with her cancer treatment after finding out she's going to be a grandma. She's actually entering remission now when in the beginning the doctors gave her a les than 5% chance of survival.
She's my little lovebug and I can't wait till she's in my arms. She's gonna be the most beautiful baby in the world I can already tell. The first time I saw her heartbeat it took my breath away with how stunningly beautiful it was.
So I'm looking forward to being a mother. I'm just afraid of what to do. They're so fragile looking and I'm gonna have to hold her at some point and I drop my phone at least six times a day! Or like, how do you even give a squirmy baby a bath!? How the hell am I supposed to close this "easy close-able" baby stroller with her in my other hand?
What if my daughter will let a guy get away with anything because he's hot. Oh, no… What if she marries a guy for his looks and let him ride on her coat tails as she achieves economic success using her amazing brains and then let him divorce her and take all of her money, leaving her with nothing but the broken pieces of their marriage and their young children who will grow up with a complex because they don't think their father wanted them?
Then, as angsty teenagers, will they experiment with drugs and rebel and blame her for their broken family until one of them, probably the oldest, runs away and is later arrested for possession? And then will she be sued in family court for parental neglect, and declared unfit to care for her children? And will the younger children be forced to file for emancipation? Then will she be all alone in her old age, used up and aged prematurely by stress to the point where no man will want her and she'll be reduced to owning a lot of cats and yelling at the neighborhood children to get off her lawn because she can't bear to see their smiling faces when her own children can't stand to look at her?
Oh my God.
HOW DO I TEACH HER NOT TO LOVE A MAN FOR HIS LOOKS!?! gonk
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 9:29 am
iLadyShira-chan HOW DO I TEACH HER NOT TO LOVE A MAN FOR HIS LOOKS!?! gonk
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 10:34 am
I'm kind of in the boat where I'd prefer to wait until I'm a bit older before having kids too. I certainly wish you luck though!
From what I understand of kids you won't really be able to decide what they take away from your parenting, you'll just have to try your best to teach good values.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:04 am
iLadyShira-chan HOW DO I TEACH HER NOT TO LOVE A MAN FOR HIS LOOKS!?! gonk Emphasize the importance of personal integrity and character in others, while simultaneously introducing them to situations that will build those traits in themselves. A person with strong inner values is far more likely to find traits other than physical attraction the prime directive for a potential life partner.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:25 am
Cobra_X iLadyShira-chan HOW DO I TEACH HER NOT TO LOVE A MAN FOR HIS LOOKS!?! gonk
"That's easy. I'll make up a list of rules, write them down on piece of paper and give them to her boyfriends. It will say:
Rules for Dating my Daughter:
1.) Don't.
I practically died a little on this inside it was so amazing.
@Rin: I wish I waited a little bit longer too, but what's done is done. And yeah, I know. I already had to sit my boyfriend down and explain to him that every parent, no matter who they are, will always F*ck their kids up in some way or another. It's one of those things in the universe that's inevitable.
I hear a lot of people say "But I'll be a good parent!" but you can never be a 100% good parent because you're human and you make mistakes. I at least hope my baby girl will be a good person when she's older and starts making her own choices.
@Greg: Totally what I plan on doing. My boyfriend was raised in an environment where his parents gave him too much freedom and spoiled him. I was raised in an environment where I was given no freedom at all. We're hoping to meet in the middle with that and raise her that way.
I still don't want my baby growing up damn it. D:
You think if I put bricks on her head she'll stay young and naive of the world we live in forever?
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:30 am
iLadyShira-chan Cobra_X iLadyShira-chan HOW DO I TEACH HER NOT TO LOVE A MAN FOR HIS LOOKS!?! gonk
"That's easy. I'll make up a list of rules, write them down on piece of paper and give them to her boyfriends. It will say:
Rules for Dating my Daughter:
1.) Don't.
I practically died a little on this inside it was so amazing.
@Rin: I wish I waited a little bit longer too, but what's done is done. And yeah, I know. I already had to sit my boyfriend down and explain to him that every parent, no matter who they are, will always F*ck their kids up in some way or another. It's one of those things in the universe that's inevitable.
I hear a lot of people say "But I'll be a good parent!" but you can never be a 100% good parent because you're human and you make mistakes. I at least hope my baby girl will be a good person when she's older and starts making her own choices.
@Greg: Totally what I plan on doing. My boyfriend was raised in an environment where his parents gave him too much freedom and spoiled him. I was raised in an environment where I was given no freedom at all. We're hoping to meet in the middle with that and raise her that way.
I still don't want my baby growing up damn it. D:
You think if I put bricks on her head she'll stay young and naive of the world we live in forever? Putting even a single brick on an infant's head would result in severely impaired brain function and physical injury. I recommend not doing that.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:31 am
Unfortunately, the way the world is now, naivety is no longer an option. Between social media and the ease of access for information, its hard to completely keep the troubles of the world out.
...not that you want to however. Isolating a child does not prepare them for life. You have to expose them and then reinforce the good in situations, so they can understand right and wrong.
As for staying young forever... science might answer it, but I doubt humans will become immortal anytime soon... at least not in our current earthly bodies.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:37 am
I hate all of you...
But in all seriousness, I realize I can't protect her from everything. I mean, she's still growing in my abdomen and I couldn't even protect her last night during the storm. Every time there was a loud crack of thunder I felt her jump cause it startled her.
So Cobra, you don't have to answer this if it invades your privacy or whatever, but have you thought of a name for your little one yet?
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Hinote Tosatsu Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:42 am
Alice...? Bunny is Shira's baby? XD
I suddenly wish I could have Team Shiny plushies... And of course some for baby Bunny too.
Solution to Daughter Dating Douchebags: Shotgun. Nuff said. Just keep one hanging under all the baby photos, in an empty area designated "Future boyfriends". They'll know when they see that to keep their proper distance. XD
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:46 am
Hinote Tosatsu Alice...? Bunny is Shira's baby? XD I suddenly wish I could have Team Shiny plushies... And of course some for baby Bunny too. Solution to Daughter Dating Douchebags: Shotgun. Nuff said. Just keep one hanging under all the baby photos, in an empty area designated "Future boyfriends". They'll know when they see that to keep their proper distance. XD
I miss Team Shiny tho...
My boyfriend actually is getting a shotgun, so that might work. He says I could probably just scare them off by glaring at them since my disapproving face looks identical to this: emotion_donotwant
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:51 am
Shira uses mean look!
...It's super effective!
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:56 am
iLadyShira-chan So Cobra, you don't have to answer this if it invades your privacy or whatever, but have you thought of a name for your little one yet?
Eliana Grace ... Eliana is a Hebrew name, it means "My God has Answered me"
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 12:18 pm
Cobra_X iLadyShira-chan So Cobra, you don't have to answer this if it invades your privacy or whatever, but have you thought of a name for your little one yet?
Eliana Grace ... Eliana is a Hebrew name, it means "My God has Answered me"
My boyfriend and I picked our daughter's middle name for the meaning, too.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 12:38 pm
All this baby talk ; - ; I love children ; - ;
@ Cobra: Congrats on the kid Cobra, you'll make a great father. Also that's a beautiful name Cobra, and props on it being Hebrew too. I have a thing for Hebrew and Persian history/tradition.
@ Shira: Honestly, the way I will raise my kid(s) Is as follows: I will give them the tools and knowledge you need to know, show you how to use them, show you what's right and what's wrong. I'll teach them that every action has a reaction, and that everything you do will affect you down the line. I won't force any believes on them, I'll let them come to their own decisions, to their own opinions, and let them chose their own life style. Personally I hate the way I was raised and wouldn't put my kids through that. Ever since i was a little kid I was taught that if you weren't perfect, you weren't worth it, and only after years of busting my a** I learned that you couldn't be perfect at everything, or at anything for that matter. One of the first lessons I'll teach my kids is that it doesn't matter if you make a mistake or not so long as you fix it. And as for those things and " life style choices " my kids make, I won't judge them over 'em. It's their life, in the end they'll do what makes them happy and whether or not they are my kids or not they are their own person and deserve to be free. I honestly can't wait to be a father, though I won't be one for years to come. Though I can't wait to hold my darling kids, hopefully a boy and a girl, in my arms. crying
My girlfriend and I have too much time and ponder on these things too much ever since one of my best friends was well raped and she decided to keep the kid.
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 12:41 pm
iLadyShira-chan My boyfriend was raised in an environment where his parents gave him too much freedom and spoiled him. I was raised in an environment where I was given no freedom at all. We're hoping to meet in the middle with that and raise her that way. I still don't want my baby growing up damn it. D: You think if I put bricks on her head she'll stay young and naive of the world we live in forever? This is sort of how it was for my girlfriend and me. Only that well my parents tried to make me the perfect little christian child... Long story short that didn't go too well.
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