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 Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 8:55 pm
vermont Nekoumi vermont OMG YOU ARE THE KINGGG .... queen** LOL! Heh, though I didn't write that I still thinks it's ******** awesome^___^ IT ISSS!!!! i cant believe it but its so funny I was like wand with wang this will be stupid Xd i stood incorected yup, that's what I thought to xd
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 8:55 pm
Nekoumi Alright, this one might offend Native Americans...but erm deal with it, theres plenty of redneck jokes out there and I'm not complaining. So this cheiftan has never farted in his life, and of course he wants to experience it. So he goes to a pharmacist and syas: "Big cheif no fart." And the pharmacist gives him 50 pills and tells him to take them and come back if he still hasn't farted. So the cheiftan does as told and comes back the next day and says: "Big cheif no fart" So the pharmacist gives him another 50 pills and tells him to do the same as before. The next day the cheiftan comes back and says: "Big cheif no fart" So the pharmacist, not knowing what else to do, gives him another 50 pills and tells him to take them slowly, one at a time. So the next day the cheiftan's 2nd in command comes to the pharmacist and says angrily: "Big fart no cheif!" LOL not as good but funny still
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 8:57 pm
yup, I'm trying to remember my funny one's, hey, you want to hear some disturbing baby jokes??? 3nodding
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 9:03 pm
Nekoumi yup, I'm trying to remember my funny one's, hey, you want to hear some disturbing baby jokes??? 3nodding Sure im up for that!!!
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 9:07 pm
vermont Nekoumi yup, I'm trying to remember my funny one's, hey, you want to hear some disturbing baby jokes??? 3nodding Sure im up for that!!! Okay Q)How many babies fit in ablender? A) 4 1/2 Q)What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A) You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork. Q)What's better, throwing rocks over a cliff or throwing babies over a cliff?? A)Babies, because you can catch them with a pitchfork. Q)Why do you put a baby ina blender feet first?? A)It's all about the facial expressions. Q)What's worse than nailing 1000 babies to one tree??? A)Nailing one baby to 1000 trees. and that's all of those that I can remember
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 9:10 pm
okay, so this brunette chick is jumping up and down in the middle of the street saying :'47, 47, 47'
And this blonde chick comes up to her and asks what she's doing, and the brunette replies,
"I'm counting, 47,47,47"
So the blonde asks if she can to.
And the Brunette says: "Sure, 47, 47, you can count with me"
So the blonde chick starts jumping up and down saying: "47, 47, 47"
And a few minutes later a truck comes barreling down the street. The brunette jumps to the side and the blonde is run over. The brunette then goes back to her jumping up and down in the middle of the street saying: "48, 48, 48,"
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 9:11 pm
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.
How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
The dog plays with it more.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it's head.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
Nail its other hand to the floor
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
Art
((just remembered a bunch more xd ))
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Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 12:47 pm
KaGe_Khoai There were 2 boys in a school. so the first little boy came in late for class. the teacher asked " Excuse me little one, why are u so late, where have u been?". the boy replied " On top of Cherry Hill". the teacher eyes widened as if shocked and called the little boys parents. The next day the second little boy came late to class. Teacher: excuse me little boy, where have you been, your late for class? Second little boy: sorry Miss. ive been on top of cherry hill the teacher was shocked and called the little boys parents. Teacher: excuse me sir, but your son says he's been coming late because he's been on top of cherry hill. is this true? The father: Cherry hill? The teacher: yes cherry hill.. why do you ask? The father: cherry hill is my daughter.... I haven't heard that since elementary school, lol. Perverted little kids.... ninja Anywho an apology ahead of time to any and all blondes out there.... A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are trapped on an island for 10 days, finally the brunette suggests swimming for it. They all agree and the red head tries first, gets a 1/4 the way to land, gets tired, and turns back. Next is the brunette, she gets 1/3 the way, gets tired, and turns back. Finally it's the blonde's turn, she swims 1/2 the way, gets tired, and turns back. A dumb blonde, the easter bunny, and a smart blonde all jump out of a plane, who hits the ground first? The dumb blonde, the rest aren't real. What's the difference between the Titanic and a blonde? You know how many went down on the Titanic. What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? You can only fit three fingers in a bowling ball. And now for a dead baby joke.....*sigh* What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One's still alive. What's worse than that? It's at the bottom. Worse than that? It eats it's way out. Worse than that? It goes back for seconds.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2005 1:04 pm
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2005 1:40 pm
Ok, i don't mean to offend any race in this joke ok?
There was a Mexican, an American, a Chinese, and a Indian man on a plane. While they ere on the plane, the first engine blew up. The pilot said "To keep this plane flying, we need everyone to throw out thier bags." So thats what they did. The next hour, the second engine blows up. The pilot then says "To keep the plane flying, we need everyone to throw out the seats." So thats what they did. 30 minutes passed, and the third engine blows up. The pilot then says "To keep this plane flying, we need 3 people to sacrifice thier lives and jump off!" So, first off was the Chinese guy. He yelled out "God save the queen!" and jumped off. The Indian guy was next and yelled out "God save the queen!" and jumped off. Then there was the Mexican and American. The Mexican pushes the American off the plane and yells out "Remember the Alamo!!"
Lmao. xd
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 10:14 am
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have
dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the
girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would
like to go out and make love for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so
he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The
pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy
everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms
he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy
insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather
busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and
meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to
meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the
girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace
and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his
head down.
10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend
leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you
were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was
a pharmacist."
rofl
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 10:16 am
and
Four men got together to play golf one sunny morning. As they
were heading out to the course, one of them was detained by a
phone call.
The other three were discussing their children while walking to
the first tee.
"My son," said one proudly, "has made quite a name for himself
in the home building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now
owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful,
in fact in the last year he was able to give a good friend a
brand new home as a gift."
The second man, not to be outdone, boasts how his son began his
career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership.
"He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a
friend two brand new cars as a gift."
The third man brags that his son has worked his way up through a
stock brokerage firm, and has become so successful that in the
last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio
as a gift.
As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, the three smugly tell
him that they have been discussing how successful their progeny
are, and ask what line of work his son is in.
"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased how my son has turned
out," he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser,
and I've just recently discovered he's gay."
As the other three recoil in horror, he continues, "but on the
bright side, he must be good at what he does, because his last
three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two new cars,
and a big stock portfolio."
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 7:31 pm
xAsh-chanx and Four men got together to play golf one sunny morning. As they were heading out to the course, one of them was detained by a phone call. The other three were discussing their children while walking to the first tee. "My son," said one proudly, "has made quite a name for himself in the home building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful, in fact in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift." The second man, not to be outdone, boasts how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a friend two brand new cars as a gift." The third man brags that his son has worked his way up through a stock brokerage firm, and has become so successful that in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift. As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, the three smugly tell him that they have been discussing how successful their progeny are, and ask what line of work his son is in. "To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased how my son has turned out," he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay." As the other three recoil in horror, he continues, "but on the bright side, he must be good at what he does, because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two new cars, and a big stock portfolio." Hahahahahaha! lol! blaugh I wish I had some good jokes to tell... so sowy... sweatdrop
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 8:43 pm
OMG! that scared the s**t out of me! God, *so scared* Those stupid lyrics are stuck in meh head and I keep seeing those pics! *cowers*
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 9:20 pm
Nekoumi - please do not post jokes about babies like that. i, being a parent, find them offensive.
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