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POISON: THE INVASION

Questions, Comments, and Concerns

This is where the link to my story, Poison, shall be posted. Any questions, comments, concerns, ramblings, exclamations of how amazing it is - please. Put them here. I will address them in timely manors.



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Here is the link:

http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2972950/1/Poison_The_Invasion

Also, this book is (c) LovetoCauseMayhem. Please don't steal it. All similarities to persons, living or dead, is completely coincidental.

Hello,

My name is Spaniard, and I have just finished reading this afore mentioned link. (Chapters 1-5, I believe.) These are my thoughts:


At first, I didn't really get where this was going. It wasn't until I kept reading that I realized the first initial chapters took place in three different settings. I feel like the settings could be described a little more (not better, just a little more) for they feel vauge.

Yet, at the same time, not putting so much attention on the setting allowed me to pay all of my attention on the story. The first two chapters were intrguing due to its mysteriousness (sp). They make me crave an explaination for what happened in these parts. The third chapter was a bit more comprehinsive, seeing as how there wasn't really much to think about as far as story. When I finally slipped into the fourth chapter, things started to blend in a little bit as I realized that the first initial chapters would soon tie together. Sure enough, by the fifth chapter, I was hooked.

The descriptions in the fifth chapter are very strong and change the tone of the story indefinately. It is here that I realized who the main character would be, who the antagonist and protagonist were more clearly, as well as being able to detect side stories that peeked my interest. Seeing as how there is still much explaination to be had, I greatly look forward to the on coming chapters to help clear up the loose ends in the initial chapters.

Actually, I've lost interest in my current read for want of focus on this story inparticular. It is modern and mature, of course, but also has deep roots with ancient characters and customs. However, I don't feel that the two different settings intervine with each other- which is an absolutely GOOD thing. Personally, if the two were to mix in together instead of staying apart, I may become too confused with the story. Then again, if this did happen at the right time, in the right place, and with the right words- then the outcome would be spectacular.

I'm not exactly sure where this story is going- that is probably what intrigues me the most. I look forward to reading the next chapters and I feel that, from where this is going so far, that I will not be dissapointed.

-Spaniard.

You should quote me when its up smile

So the book is totally done. Kinda sorta.

Eventually I'll post the rest up. xDDD When it sinks in that YES, I HAVE TIME NOW.

Oh you. You. You are so amazing. <3

Yeah, ff.net has this crappy little security feature that if a sentence goes on too long without any spaces they cut a chunk of it out. Alina actually goes on a rant about how his manager is a <******** yeah. I hate that. Seriously. -.-

I would love to publish this. When I get it over 150 pages. D8<

But I'm so glad that you liked it. biggrin For the past few months I've been tweaking, adding a few lines here and there, but I REALLY need to get the rest posted. ><

It does. Really annoying.

If there's any other website that I can put it without having to deal with that, I'd love to just delete the story off that site and put it somewhere else.

And yes. Yes there is. And I have no idea. Um... I wanna say thirty...? Pretty close to it...?