OK, so I'm thinking of going to WalMart tomorrow morning, because they have this GPS for 97 bucks, and I'm all "I need that, and gas is cheap, and I wanna drive and get lost and find my way back".
SO, I had to come up with a gameplan. Now, you guys can tell me if it will work.
I will show up at around 4... and then when they begin letting people in, I will tackle and trip old people. Now while the good samaritans are helping the poor old people up, I will roam through the bottlenecked traffic and steal the children, lure them away with candy maybe, then shove them all into the dressing rooms. And while the parents go frantic looking for their children, I will rummage through their carts and see if there is anything in there I want/need/think I could afford, and then go pay. Once I am in line, I will RUDELY stare at other people, and discretly throw gum into their hair. Once the people ahead of me notice the gum in their hair, they will have no choice but to complain about it... I will then whip out my secret weapon which is my 4 year old cousin, SHE can scream with the best of them... I will sick her on everyone in line and they will all just start getting annoyed, now the people with gum in their hair will just give up and go get rid of them gum, the other people will be looking at the 4 year old banshee running around, and I will use that time to cause a horrible cart accident sending everyones carts into a huge pile-up. I will then stand by one of the carts and scream "HEY!" and proceed to flip over one of the carts, sending everything in it flying. Then I'll look around and ask "WHO JUST PUSHED ME?!?!?!?! GOD DAMN IT MOTHER ******** s**t FACE ******** ASSHOLES ******** ******** ********!!!"... everyone will look at me while my little cousin pushed my cart right up to the register, and begins unloading the stuff on to the belt, once she has finished, I will walk up, and proceed to pay.
Good plan right guys? Any tips?
Anybody else going to cause some carnage?
Any fun "Tales From Black Friday" stories?
SO, I had to come up with a gameplan. Now, you guys can tell me if it will work.
I will show up at around 4... and then when they begin letting people in, I will tackle and trip old people. Now while the good samaritans are helping the poor old people up, I will roam through the bottlenecked traffic and steal the children, lure them away with candy maybe, then shove them all into the dressing rooms. And while the parents go frantic looking for their children, I will rummage through their carts and see if there is anything in there I want/need/think I could afford, and then go pay. Once I am in line, I will RUDELY stare at other people, and discretly throw gum into their hair. Once the people ahead of me notice the gum in their hair, they will have no choice but to complain about it... I will then whip out my secret weapon which is my 4 year old cousin, SHE can scream with the best of them... I will sick her on everyone in line and they will all just start getting annoyed, now the people with gum in their hair will just give up and go get rid of them gum, the other people will be looking at the 4 year old banshee running around, and I will use that time to cause a horrible cart accident sending everyones carts into a huge pile-up. I will then stand by one of the carts and scream "HEY!" and proceed to flip over one of the carts, sending everything in it flying. Then I'll look around and ask "WHO JUST PUSHED ME?!?!?!?! GOD DAMN IT MOTHER ******** s**t FACE ******** ASSHOLES ******** ******** ********!!!"... everyone will look at me while my little cousin pushed my cart right up to the register, and begins unloading the stuff on to the belt, once she has finished, I will walk up, and proceed to pay.
Good plan right guys? Any tips?
Anybody else going to cause some carnage?
Any fun "Tales From Black Friday" stories?
