Lady Nightwolf
(?)Community Member
- Posted: Fri, 01 Apr 2005 23:27:29 +0000
<center>Stress<center>
I have been asked to post this for someone i know. Please help by giving input into this problem that i will then forward to her
Stress
I have so much I need to do. So much I want to do. I need to manage my time better. I need to stay focused and motivated. I have little self-discipline, which causes me to not pull through on most of my goals.
I need to get caught up in history, English, and pre-calculus. I need to find a photographer for prom. I need to deal with my whole driving situation. I need to work this summer so I can afford a car. I need to fix past grades. I need to lose weight. I need to help clean up the house and backyard. I need to take care of the dog. And on top of all this I have to also balance keeping my friends, family and boyfriend happy.
I?ve been so stressed. I?m still stressed. I wake up feeling sick everyday; whether it?s nausea, some kind of cold, or just a feeling of fatigue. I have a really hard time making it through the day.
I?m also stressed about college. I don?t know what I want to be anymore. I don?t know if I want to be a pediatrician anymore. I need to pick something though. I?m running out of time. I need to know what I want to do so I can pick an appropriate college. I need to know so I can fulfill all the requirements that the college I pick requires. I don?t know how I?m going to afford college. My mother?s a single mom. My dad?s been un-employed since I was 6. The expenses of the divorce have drained her. She doesn?t have a college degree. She?s going back now, but she doesn?t have any money saved away. Not even for her retirement. I don?t have the grades for scholarships either. All because I was stupid and fooled around during most of high school. I guess I?ll have to cross that bridge when I get to it.
This issue with my weight really gets to me, too. It hits me so hard. It?s gotten to the point where I hate looking at myself in the mirror. I hate trying on clothes. I look at myself in the fitting rooms and all I see are the bulges and the dimples and the stretch marks that are developing. I can?t even look at myself in the mirrors when I?m in dance class. When we do any kind of routines facing the mirrors I always look at the teacher or someone?s feet in front of me. I?ve been trying to diet and exercise but it?s so hard. I stick to it for the most part but it doesn?t seem to be working. There?ve been two times this school year where I?ve come so close to making myself throw-up when I ate something unhealthy. It scares me. It scares me so much to think that I?ve become so desperate that I would even so much as consider hurting myself like that. I?m so terrified by the fact that I?ve let my weight problems and self-image issues get so out of control.
I don?t like the way I feel about myself anymore. I don?t like the way I look at myself anymore. I look at myself and I get so unhappy. I get so upset over the way I?ve let myself slip. I get upset for falling behind and screwing around in school. I get upset over the direction my weight has turned. I look at my back and shoulders and get upset over the fact that the acne I had in elementary school has left my skin flecked with small dark discolorations. Sometimes I feel like I just want to crawl out of myself. Just crawl out of my body and leave it behind.
I have been asked to post this for someone i know. Please help by giving input into this problem that i will then forward to her
Stress
I have so much I need to do. So much I want to do. I need to manage my time better. I need to stay focused and motivated. I have little self-discipline, which causes me to not pull through on most of my goals.
I need to get caught up in history, English, and pre-calculus. I need to find a photographer for prom. I need to deal with my whole driving situation. I need to work this summer so I can afford a car. I need to fix past grades. I need to lose weight. I need to help clean up the house and backyard. I need to take care of the dog. And on top of all this I have to also balance keeping my friends, family and boyfriend happy.
I?ve been so stressed. I?m still stressed. I wake up feeling sick everyday; whether it?s nausea, some kind of cold, or just a feeling of fatigue. I have a really hard time making it through the day.
I?m also stressed about college. I don?t know what I want to be anymore. I don?t know if I want to be a pediatrician anymore. I need to pick something though. I?m running out of time. I need to know what I want to do so I can pick an appropriate college. I need to know so I can fulfill all the requirements that the college I pick requires. I don?t know how I?m going to afford college. My mother?s a single mom. My dad?s been un-employed since I was 6. The expenses of the divorce have drained her. She doesn?t have a college degree. She?s going back now, but she doesn?t have any money saved away. Not even for her retirement. I don?t have the grades for scholarships either. All because I was stupid and fooled around during most of high school. I guess I?ll have to cross that bridge when I get to it.
This issue with my weight really gets to me, too. It hits me so hard. It?s gotten to the point where I hate looking at myself in the mirror. I hate trying on clothes. I look at myself in the fitting rooms and all I see are the bulges and the dimples and the stretch marks that are developing. I can?t even look at myself in the mirrors when I?m in dance class. When we do any kind of routines facing the mirrors I always look at the teacher or someone?s feet in front of me. I?ve been trying to diet and exercise but it?s so hard. I stick to it for the most part but it doesn?t seem to be working. There?ve been two times this school year where I?ve come so close to making myself throw-up when I ate something unhealthy. It scares me. It scares me so much to think that I?ve become so desperate that I would even so much as consider hurting myself like that. I?m so terrified by the fact that I?ve let my weight problems and self-image issues get so out of control.
I don?t like the way I feel about myself anymore. I don?t like the way I look at myself anymore. I look at myself and I get so unhappy. I get so upset over the way I?ve let myself slip. I get upset for falling behind and screwing around in school. I get upset over the direction my weight has turned. I look at my back and shoulders and get upset over the fact that the acne I had in elementary school has left my skin flecked with small dark discolorations. Sometimes I feel like I just want to crawl out of myself. Just crawl out of my body and leave it behind.