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I've been lurking the OS/P, and I must say, people need to start making their beginnings more interesting. Sure, once it's in a book, people will probably get farther than the first page, but on the internet, it's just so easy to close the window once your sugar-induced short attention span wears off and find something that you like the sound of better.

The worst way to start off a story is by getting on with Project: Explain The World*, as proven by many reviewers, and, sadly, that's how far too many fantasy stories start.

There's always my heirarchy on the best way to start a story, but it may be different to you. So, how does your story start? If you want, post your 1st paragraph and see how it fares. Also, discuss what you think is the best way to start and force reader to read and come back crawling for more.

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Michelle touched the cool blade of the butter knife she was holding softly
against her lips before setting it on top of a plump walnut. She applied
pressure and with a light 'crack' the shell fell in two pieces. She placed
the nut inside of her mouth and chewed it as the memory of her older
sister Alison once again returned to her mind. Walnuts were her favorite
food- especially on cheesecake. Michelle had never liked the two
together, but Alison would combine them each chance she got. She
sighed- it seemed like it had only been days ago that they had laughed
together as they flipped through magazines, giggling over how much
some people seemed to actually care about the latest celeb breakup, the
newest movies that were coming out, and who could have the skinniest
body possible. That was the last time she had seen her, and she ached
for it again. But, no- her death had taken place one year ago today.

Are you hooked? surprised

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I find the start of the story (and the name for that matter) the hardest thing to write. I think after a year of trying to find that perfect beginning, I've actually found a decent one. Depite this, it will probably change.
The start of my story starts in the village where my main character lives. A boat comes, the bad guys arrive, steal my main character's mother and then run off. Main character stows away in their boat, is found, chucked off and then luckily is found minutes later by an eccentric fisherman.

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TheSugarPieFanatic
I find the start of the story (and the name for that matter) the hardest thing to write. I think after a year of trying to find that perfect beginning, I've actually found a decent one. Depite this, it will probably change.
The start of my story starts in the village where my main character lives. A boat comes, the bad guys arrive, steal my main character's mother and then run off. Main character stows away in their boat, is found, chucked off and then luckily is found minutes later by an eccentric fisherman.


It really took you a year to come up with a beginning?

I suppose I'm lucky, beginings are easy for me; its the ends that kill me.

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My paragraph:

The machine was large, because Louise has yet to invent anything in a convenient size. It was also very handsome, lined in forest green silk and with an exterior of green-stained cherry wood. The whole thing was shaped like a giant frog. Sometimes I think that Louise cares more about how her inventions look than what they do.

I think that there are many different ways to start a story well.

I've heard that the best way to start is in a way that makes the reader curious. If your first sentence is something like, "I know who killed John Smith," the reader will want to find out who John Smith was and who killed him.

If you start with an odd situation -- "John Smith dangled by his wrists from the ceiling, dead. Someone had placed a bright pink cowboy hat on his head. I sighed. Why did this sort of thing keep happening to me?" -- the reader will want to know what lead up to the situation.

If you start with something that makes the reader laugh, the reader will probably continue to read because laughing is nice.

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I find it very hard to create a good beginning without first finishing the story. If you wanna hook someone, it can be hard to do without a little foreshadowing. I find that going straight into the action when all else fails is the best way to go.

It's tough for me, though, because I just can't seem to get over the fact that the story isn't going to be perfect the first time through, and that I can have as many times to go through and edit it as I need. I rarely get past the beginning of a story because of that. sweatdrop

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The worst thing you can do is start your story off with an infodump. This is unfortunately very common with novice fantasy writers. I cry every time I see something like this:

Quote:
A long, long time ago, there was a Dark Angel and a Light Angel. They lived in peace together in Asdfghjkl City, and so did all the people of the world. They liked to sing and dance and play basketball all the time, and everything was perfect. In honor of the Angels, the people of Asdfghjkl built a massive sculpture of a fish and a kangaroo outside of the big castle made out of sapphires. However, in the year 1234, the Dark Angel forsaw a horrible disaster: a large asteroid was hurling towards the world with suprising speed and would eventually crash into it and blow it up. To save the city, she raced into space and stopped it before it could crush it. Her posse were enraged at the Light Angel's people because it was obviously the Light Angel's fault that their god got destroyed, and the Dark waged a terrible war against the Light. The Light Angel heard of the incident while she was getting her nails done, fled from her castle and locked herself away. Now, this is the year 4567, and the Light and Dark people are spread out all across the country and they all hate each other. Our story starts with a young Darkling orphan on a farm...


For the love of all that is right and good, do NOT do that. Start with some action instead. That way, people are going to want to know what happens next. They get a first impression of the main character(s). The badly-written example I just typed up has just told the reader everything about the world, and leaves almost nothing for the reader to wonder about. There's no hook, no forshadowing, and no main character.

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Narr
The worst thing you can do is start your story off with an infodump. This is unfortunately very common with novice fantasy writers. I cry every time I see something like this:

Quote:
A long, long time ago, there was a Dark Angel and a Light Angel. They lived in peace together in Asdfghjkl City, and so did all the people of the world. They liked to sing and dance and play basketball all the time, and everything was perfect. In honor of the Angels, the people of Asdfghjkl built a massive sculpture of a fish and a kangaroo outside of the big castle made out of sapphires. However, in the year 1234, the Dark Angel forsaw a horrible disaster: a large asteroid was hurling towards the world with suprising speed and would eventually crash into it and blow it up. To save the city, she raced into space and stopped it before it could crush it. Her posse were enraged at the Light Angel's people because it was obviously the Light Angel's fault that their god got destroyed, and the Dark waged a terrible war against the Light. The Light Angel heard of the incident while she was getting her nails done, fled from her castle and locked herself away. Now, this is the year 4567, and the Light and Dark people are spread out all across the country and they all hate each other. Our story starts with a young Darkling orphan on a farm...


For the love of all that is right and good, do NOT do that. Start with some action instead. That way, people are going to want to know what happens next. They get a first impression of the main character(s). The badly-written example I just typed up has just told the reader everything about the world, and leaves almost nothing for the reader to wonder about. There's no hook, no forshadowing, and no main character.


What about in prologues? Because in my novel I put most of the necessary information in the begining because otherwise you would have no idea what's going on, but it doesn't give you all the information, it just sort of explains what's going on.... does that kill the story?

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.[ Cheesecube ].
Michelle touched the cool blade of the butter knife she was holding softly
against her lips before setting it on top of a plump walnut. She applied
pressure and with a light 'crack' the shell fell in two pieces. She placed
the nut inside of her mouth and chewed it as the memory of her older
sister Alison once again returned to her mind. Walnuts were her favorite
food- especially on cheesecake. Michelle had never liked the two
together, but Alison would combine them each chance she got. She
sighed- it seemed like it had only been days ago that they had laughed
together as they flipped through magazines, giggling over how much
some people seemed to actually care about the latest celeb breakup, the
newest movies that were coming out, and who could have the skinniest
body possible. That was the last time she had seen her, and she ached
for it again. But, no- her death had taken place one year ago today.

Are you hooked? surprised



In this case, I don't particularly think that it's that the writing is bad, but that the organization sucks. Have your last sentence be your first and make the rest of it be a new paragraph. If people don't seem to be eating something up and you can't really why, change the organization and the format.

Remember-- Marley was dead, to begin with.

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Mmmg. Mine starts out like this:

Quote:
It all started in a tavern. That's how these kinds of things always start. Dreadful places, taverns are. Or, at least, they're dreadful when sober. As you become inebriated, they become more and more tolerable until you like it so much that you decide to get to know the floor intimately, and by the time you're really in love with the place, they throw you out.


Mmn, Yes. I suppose that's one way to start.

Narr, that's horrible! My eyes are bleeding! gonk

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First Paragraph:

Matt Braeuer had always been a scrappy kid. He was scrappy, and he was good. He loved to play basketball, and he had aspirations to coach, much like his father, Ed Braeuer. In Wichita, Matt was loved by just about everyone. Teenage girls think he's, to borrow a teenage girl's term, cute. The 8-year old kid in the stands, who has aspirations to play College basketball, loves Matt because he proves that anything can be done, no matter what your size. The fan that has been attending Wichita State basketball games for 40 years loves Matt because he plays hard, the way players used to play. Behind the scenes, Matt is as frenetic as he is on the court. He's always pulling a prank on a teammate (Probably Sean Ogirri), or he's smiling at the blonde girl across the bar, who's been looking at him all night long. Nevertheless, no matter what Matt's doing, he's making it known that he's doing it, whether it's being overly-emotional during a game, or being loud and crazy after it. Matt is leaving a mark on everything, because in the end, he wants to be remembered.

The thing about this story is, the begining is more of the background of the main Character, Matt, because the setting is like in College, during the duration of his Sophomore basketball season. The first Chapeter makes a lot more sense.

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Maybe it's just me, haphazard, but the start feels horridly fragmented. my personal taste tells me you don't need to many seperated sentences or sentence fragments, even.

Other than that, I like it. It has a sort of feel that suggests chainsmoking elves with fedora hats who hang around in seedy taverns and bite back the tears as the half-orc pianist starts to play "As Time Goes By".

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Start with something strange for a opening line. If it's something weird then people will want to read more. The opening line to "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" is a good example.

Also try not to have the opening be exposition.

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Eswizzle
.[ Cheesecube ].
Michelle touched the cool blade of the butter knife she was holding softly
against her lips before setting it on top of a plump walnut. She applied
pressure and with a light 'crack' the shell fell in two pieces. She placed
the nut inside of her mouth and chewed it as the memory of her older
sister Alison once again returned to her mind. Walnuts were her favorite
food- especially on cheesecake. Michelle had never liked the two
together, but Alison would combine them each chance she got. She
sighed- it seemed like it had only been days ago that they had laughed
together as they flipped through magazines, giggling over how much
some people seemed to actually care about the latest celeb breakup, the
newest movies that were coming out, and who could have the skinniest
body possible. That was the last time she had seen her, and she ached
for it again. But, no- her death had taken place one year ago today.

Are you hooked? surprised



In this case, I don't particularly think that it's that the writing is bad, but that the organization sucks. Have your last sentence be your first and make the rest of it be a new paragraph. If people don't seem to be eating something up and you can't really why, change the organization and the format.

Remember-- Marley was dead, to begin with.


Ummm... Marley?
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