Tracer

I'm right beside you yet I am so far, so distant, so alone in a place I call my sanctuary. No one has found me, no one.

Random Fact #1 My blood type is AB.

I joined Gaia way back 2008. To be honest, I am not that interested in it anymore. But, I visit every now and then for teh lolz. No, not really. Ignore that random character change. That was just the caffeine talking.

Random Fact #2 I am random.

One of the primary reasons I'm here is that I love the 2D world. That, and my friend invited me. I am quite the otaku.

Random Fact #3 I am a hikikomori (70%). Also, a genuine NEET during summer vacation.

So basically, I'm a creep... but only if you dislike geeks. Otherwise, we're good.

Random Fact #4 I'm a girl.

I often use male characters online (games, social networking sites, whatever). It's because I have a tendency to draw male characters more than I do female characters. And so, I like using male avatars.

I was once playing Ragnarok Online 2 (which is pretty boring by the way) with my female friends and I went to Prontera to help them level up since I was way ahead. Then, some random guy pm-ed me asking for help. I was talking to him for a bit in whisper mode but he was using the public chat. It went smoothly though.

Now, my friend was already at the center of the city and she was pm-ing me asking if I was there already. I ignored her because I was helping that other guy and she was standing about 10 meters away from my character. I figured she'd see me soon enough. And, she did. She told my other friend that I was there through the public chat. But, I was still ignoring them because I figured they'd figure out that I was talking to someone. And, they did. As I finished my conversation with the guy though, he said, "Thank you Sir."

My friends cracked up when we talked about it the next day. I never bother to correct people I pass by online because my avatar is a guy in the first place and besides, it's not like we're gonna meet again. Well, now that friend of mine is treating me like a guy in real life.

So basically, they're not really mistaken. I use male avatars after all.

Random Fact #5 Seriously, I am a girl. Yes, this deserves two entries.

I often don't shout out my gender online. I am not very particular when it comes to gender roles anyway because it's just a construct of society. And well, a hikikomori shuns out society. I believe in androgyny!

In forums however, people are surprised that I am a girl. I like games, anime, manga, books, visual novels, and whatever. I think there are plenty of girls who are into that but for some reason people just assume that otaku that incessantly talk about these things online are guys.


Random Fact #6 I am a database.

I like data. When I post in the forums, I really delve into in-depth information. When I talk about anything Type-Moon, I tend to rant. People who also like anime/manga/game data like it though. To wit, I receive comments like, "I really like this guy."

If a real life friend of mine is part of the conversation though, s/he would say, "She's a girl not a guy." And, I crack up. It's seriously a lot funnier when someone else says it. Like I said, I don't really bother to correct anyone.

Now, why am I stressing this when I just said that it's not really a big deal? Well, just to prove a point that I am not some creepy middle-aged guy pretending to be a girl while otherwise having data against that possibility. [Heck, I'm still a teenager for heaven's sake!] Some people still don't believe me when I reveal my gender online. Again, it's not really a big deal. In fact, I find it hilarious hence, the two scenarios I related above for your lolz or disdain.

Anyway, this only affirms to the fact that I'm a total geek. It's not just about anime and the like, I also rant about science, math, and philosophy. Yeah, people think I'm weird. I think I'm attracted to intelligence. Sapiosexual? No, not really. I like ideas and the feeling of them swirling in my mind. It's a perfectly [erotic] sensation.

Random Fact #7 I like saying erotic...when I'm alone. It's Rika's fault!

I was watching Haganai S2 and was reminiscing about Rika, my favorite character in the show, saying her epic lines. "I think I can go for anything as long as it's erotic." in particular, got stuck in my mind. And so, as I was re-watching Honey and Clover, I was particularly enjoying a certain non-erotic scene and somehow as I was thinking of how to describe it, the word "erotic" came out.

My ideation went like this:

"This is....This is so....

ugh..

This is so perfectly...erotic!"

So basically, I am not using it for its original meaning. This usage may only last during this summer break though as it might've just been the caffeine talking again. But seriously though, new information excites me.

Random Fact #8 My dream is to become the Emperor of Visual Novels.

When I say Visual Novels, I mean galge, eroge, otoge, and the like. I love visual novels and I am collecting them. Of course, they are rarely released outside Japan so for now, I am collecting the soft copies and fan translations. This all broils down to my love for Fate/stay night. The anime was enjoyable but really, you've missed out if you haven't tried the visual novel. The depth of it is just amazing. Of course, it's an eroge so it has them H-scenes. But, if you're particular about that, it's nothing the zero nudity patch can't fix.

And so, my goal in life is to be able to play all visual novels ever created. Yes, I probably wouldn't be able to do it. Plus, it does get boring because there are some really crappy stories and well, the demographic of visual novels usually targets the Mature variety so it gets a bit generic.

Random Fact #9 I am not a pervert! Oh wait, I probably am.

There have been times when I'm just sitting on a chair and I suddenly think, "Oh crap, I'm a pervert."

But, I'm not. In the least, I am not the kind of pervert so often seen on TV generally. The fact is, I don't really make a big deal about eroticism. Poetry, prose, imagery all concern eroticism and I like it as a form of art.

It's ART! Dammit! ART!

Seriously though, it is art. But, I can't really respect people who get off on it in an overly obsessive manner to the point where they attack others or ruin other people's lives. They're the type who are shunned by society. I have shunned society. Learn the difference! Reality and I have a deal. I won't bother it and it won't bother me.

It's technically impossible to be the Emperor of Visual Novels without coming across a couple of H-scenes. Oh crap, how much amateur porn will I have to go through just for completion. Sigh.

Random Fact #10 I am outgoing. Say what?

I easily make friends. I am the popular pick for speeches, particularly impromptu speeches and debates. Acads are never really a problem. Yeah, that's seriously in stark contrast to my way of life. My skill set just happens to be like that so what can I do about it?

That tidbit about me shunning away society is only half-true anyway. I conform to society's norms. Why? Because I don't want to be bothered. It doesn't mean I have to like society. I am doing the bare minimum required of me to be a functional human so it's alright.

Lately, I've been dancing around the lines of that minimum though. Summer break is allowing me to be a full pledged shut-in and I really don't want to be bothered to go out just to buy food. So, I was living on cup noodles, coffee, and junk food for a while. I have eaten properly now though. So, s'all good.

Random Fact #11 I am an alien.

When I entered college two years ago, it was a new environment. It just so happened though that I got my English class with 3 of my batchmates. Our class was at 7:30am.

One day, I arrived at around 7:20 and one of my batchmates (not part of the 3 I metioned above) was there to greet her friend. When she saw me, she asked, "San ka galing?" which roughly translate to, "Where were you?"

I answered, "Mars."

Her question was asking where I was before going there and not the "Where were you?" as if I was late. So at that kind of time, it should've been natural to think that I was at home before then. Besides, my hair was still wet from the shower so it should've been obvious that I just came from my boarding house.

It was unnecessary small talk because there was no point to the question. So, I answered "Mars" as an obvious joke.

They're response was the arbitrary, "Oh...Okay?"

And then, I realized that even though I've known them for about a week, they were not used to my personality yet. The 3 people I mentioned got used to it a bit as I usually talk with them before English class started.

She probably didn't know how to treat that answer. I mean for all she knew, I might've been an eccentric who truly believed that I was an alien. So, I eased her mind...by saying, "Yeah, I passed by the moon when I got here. The wormhole was a bit hard to get through but I at least made it in time for class."

At this stage, I'm pretty sure she caught on to the fact that I was joking. She went along with it and now, she understands how incredibly random I am. She's in Japan now though. Bring me my chocolates!

My batchmates now call me an alien though as a joke was made about my weird actions to be a result of me being an alien.

Random Fact #12 I am eccentric.

As I said before, I am a total shut-in right now. As such, I've been sleeping from 6 am to 4pm and I go out at around 10 pm if I ever need to eat. But, as I continued to adjust that. I now sleep at 10pm. Funny thing is I always wake up at 5am now without even using an alarm clock. It's funny because I'm the type to really sleep in. Heck, I am almost always late for my first period class. A bit of swindling did get me past it though since I would've failed if they had noticed that I had too many lates and absences.

I am seriously lazy. I suck at projects because I can't help cramming. My guidance counselor was even wondering how I passed my subjects without studying or preparing at all. But, she had the usual reaction, when I told her I actually had the best grades in my batch. Foolish Human! Not to brag really, but as I like random data, I can store whatever crap teachers are spewing even though I am not paying much attention. And sides, a little deduction can easily make use of all the data I have. My fail-safe for exams is to study during the exams by using the exam itself.

I once entered an exam 45 minutes late without any food or sleep. What? I was playing a visual novel and the heroine got kidnapped! DO YOU EXPECT ME TO JUST LEAVE HER BEHIND FOR SOME EXAM? Even if there was a save point, I would never. That and I was too lazy to take a bath and get away from my chair. Yes, the latter is my real primary reason.

Random Fact #13 I like 13.

I was born on Friday the 13th.

Fuhahahahahahaha!