Reiko Iwamaru's avatar

Last Login: 01/31/2015 7:36 am

Registered: 03/29/2012

Gender: Female

Location: Cairo, Egypt (2015)

Birthday: 09/11/1998

Occupation: Trying to drive and get a job.

:Random: The Daily Mad-Libs (January)

1000 Frying-pan Narwhals
By: Reiko Iwamaru

Glab paced Lovingly back and forth. Loathed dread filled her heart. Glub should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like her to be late. Oh, my Many-colored love, Glab thought. Where could you be?

Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Glub had been taken hostage by Angry Scrotum, a supervillain who had the city in a state of Irritated terror. Glab fainted dead away, Like a drunk octopus trying to unscrew your head like a light-bulb..

When she came to, there was a bump on her v****a and the Loathed dread had returned. "Glub, my Checker honey bunny," she cried out Sarcastically. "What is Angry Scrotum doing to you?" Probably torturing her, laughing Lazily as he Smacked her in the Gluteus Maximus.

In the midst of all the terror and tears, Glab remembered a story her grandmother had told her. If you fold 1000 Frying-pan Narwhals, then whatever you wish for will come true.

Glab ordered in a supply of Frying-pan and set to work, folding Narwhals until her v****a was sore and she could hardly see. It took a week. She was just finishing up the very last Narwhal when Glub walked in the front door.

"Glub!" Glab screamed and threw herself into Glub's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 Frying-pan Narwhals and it brought you back to me." She was so happy, she felt like she was dancing With a deranged lunatic. She kissed Glub Huskily on the Gluteus Maximus.

"Actually," Glub said, pulling away Dreamily, "I was rescued by the Hated Fire. She's a new superhero in town." Glub sighed. "And she's really Loving."

The Loathed dread came back. "But you're Iridescent to be back here with me, right?"

Glub checked her watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the Hated Fire for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay Loved, baby." She left and the door banged behind her.

Glab choked back a sob and started folding another Narwhal. Then she went out and got drunk instead.

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Who I am is not the same as what I am

//Reiko Iwamaru//9/11//16//Virgo//Austism Spectrum Disorder//Social Anxiety Disorder//Schizophrenic (Diagnosis not yet confirmed)//Anorexic (In both terms)//Bisexual//

If you want to know something else, talk. Don't friend me without talking, or else you will be ignored. :3

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Sweetest Notes

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Dusk Dunes - Kirby's Epic Yarn OST

Yeah I'm weird, so what?

Favorite Movies/Anime

Favorite TV Shows

Favorite Reads

Favorite Music/Bands


I'm being people watched? Weird!

Hypno Katsumi on 01/31/2015
trashkawa on 01/31/2015
fluffy ghoul on 01/28/2015
Paper Friend on 01/27/2015
iMr Kcheen on 01/27/2015
Maldan on 01/27/2015
x64 on 01/27/2015
Buttingston on 01/26/2015
Osrali Virgo on 01/26/2015
MoonlightKo on 01/26/2015
Ark Angel de le Luna on 01/25/2015
prayersinchairs on 01/25/2015
JayyLee10 on 01/24/2015
Yume no Shirube on 01/24/2015
Fiddled Things on 01/24/2015
Erin Freya on 01/24/2015
Skye of the Wind on 01/23/2015
Micha the Inu on 01/22/2015
Demoniqat on 01/17/2015
Dominicrune on 01/15/2015

This is what I wear.

The things I earned in zOMG! ❤

  • Lawn Gnome Clipper[122]
  • Pink Flamingo Fighter[125]
  • Air Fluff Deflater[131]
  • Garlic Picker[134]
  • Skeeter Squasher[137]
  • Cherry Fluff Victor[149]
  • Taiko Drum Banger[152]
  • Ghost Lantern Dim[155]
  • Kokeshi Doll Trickster[158]
  • Kokeshi Doll Reveler[159]
  • Outlaw Pup Blaster[167]
  • Buzz Saw Splitter[170]
  • Buzz Saw Cutter[171]
  • Buzz Saw Slasher[172]
  • Shockroach Colony[188]
  • Alien Walker Limper[194]
  • Brain Clam Bump[209]
  • Sea Spout Swirl[215]
  • Gnoman's Land[222]
  • Durem Blockade[224]
  • Date Rock[225]
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The Life and Times of Reiko Iwamaru

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Reiko's Storybook Log

Everything that has happened and everything that has been received shall be put here... I also have a story going! So this is where I will put my story~ YOU STEAL. YOU GET BITTEN. Got it?! ---DEGESU! ZOI!

Exclusive Hand Writing

(Art by an anonymous benefactor.)Click here for the art from -Fancy R!)

:Random: Poetry

Sonnet #3

It's that stunning time of occasion now,

The balls drop, time changes, things grow anew.

Celebrate for the new year in a glow,

While the winds of joy let all candles blew.


For some, it's a new year of joy and laughs,

For some, it's a new year of rage and pain.

We dial down for our planned future's graph,

And soon we all wait for something to gain.


Five, four, three, two one, it's time to party!

Time to throw away your worries and dance!

Try not to be too late and grow tarty,

While we all go on the dance floor and prance.


A new year's something to smile and hope,
While we all wait for good feelings to grope.
Edwin jarvis
Osrali Virgo
fluffy ghoul
Yume no Shirube
Problem Child 215
Princess Voltari
Huggable Kawaiii
Bloody Valentine 47
The Fallen Oreo
Angels Alibi
-Fancy R
Big Blue Nation