About

Forgive me, for not introducing ostrich sex. My name is Biggus Dickus. Now, I'm sure you are fornicating over its pronunciation, so for your sake, as well as mine, it is phonated,
Bigg-us
d**k-us.

However, that is not the name I was given at birth. I was born Vacelius Marysue, to Apornwench and Cocksmith, in the year 320 B.C. And I was not made a skeeve until the nineteenth year of my graphic life.

Why was I changed into a Creature of the Ostrich Sex? I do not know. My maker told me it rubs the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again. And that is what I believe now, but whatever the ******** ******** ******** ******** ********, ******** ******** c**k because I have no other choice.

My appearance may be quite different but then again, it may not. My hair is as lavender as Celebrian's nipples, and falls below the edges of the king's ball-holder. My eyes are a beautiful, silver b***h, which some say are elven more precious than the king's salty gifts, but that is for you to decide.

My father was Johnny Holmes; his father was one of the original Celts that were employed as a soldier in the Egyptian army under the Pharaoh Julius Pleaser. My blood is somehow mixed with that of the ancient Kings and Queens of Egypt, so naturally, domination was coursing through my father's veins, as well as through mine as I porntificated my every night on the set.

The place where I begin is ostrich sex.

Yes, ostrich sex. NO EXCEPTIONS.

-Biggus Dickus

Friends

Comments

Viewing 10 of 20 comments.

davidredtow

Report | 01/23/2007 11:20 am

davidredtow

mst3k rules
Princess_Evil

Report | 12/28/2006 8:33 pm

Princess_Evil

You're awesome! XD No, really!
Follow My Lied

Report | 12/23/2006 1:03 am

Follow My Lied

Who're you?
Who're you?
Who're you?
Who're you?

I'm the proprietor of this delicatessen.
HumanAfterAll

Report | 12/12/2006 6:46 pm

HumanAfterAll

Your profile is how you say interesting with a bit of odd. But I think that's a good think. Your wording intrigues me very much so. I like it. Add me if you wish to do so. Thank you. <3 Meus Angelus of Luna
satansrose

Report | 12/01/2006 7:05 pm

satansrose

While the mention of something as random as 'ostrich sex' lured me in here I shall slowly tiptoe away but for a lack of a better word I must say your profile is quite fascinating.
Riomi

Report | 11/20/2006 9:20 pm

Riomi

I love you too! Sorry it took me so long to add this account, I was away for awhile and when I actually took the time to look at my comments I had finally realized you gave me your other account names =P
Madrede_Setedra

Report | 11/08/2006 9:08 pm

Madrede_Setedra

That is one of the most borderline pronographic profiles I have ever read. That was a pleasure to my senses, my dear. Very amusing.
Ostrich Sex and Tequila

Report | 10/26/2006 11:06 pm

Ostrich Sex and Tequila

Oh, but your comments are an unending source of entertainment for me and my friends, gLItt4R gURl 101. Dance, monkey, dance!
gLItt4R gURl 101

Report | 10/26/2006 4:35 pm

gLItt4R gURl 101

wtf is ur problem ostrich sex ur so annoying! wateva if my profile is preppy ur just jealous. its better to be a normal girly girl instead of a sick weird guy that lyks to talk about sex lyk u. and u better stop ostrich or im reporting u. im so not kidding. IF U LEAVE ME ALONE I'LL LEAVE U ALONE! PRETEND WE NEVER TALKED NOW DONT COMMENT BACK!!!!!!!! im sry if i hurt ur feelings now plz dont comment back and i will leave u alone i promise
gLItt4R gURl 101

Report | 10/20/2006 2:03 pm

gLItt4R gURl 101

whats wrong with being a normal preppy girl? most girls are cool and preppy and im one of them. i dont care what you say but its just sick to have a porn star on ur profile. now stop talking to me gawd.

Signature

Yes, ostrich sex. NO EXCEPTIONS.