dad, you were the smartest person i've ever known, and will always be the smartest person i'll ever know. i only had one father in the world, and that was you. i have my many regrets and unfinished thoughts, wishes, obligations, responsibilities. you had a hard life, and that's why you passed so early. i would be very bitter right now if you had not given me words of courage before. life isn't fair, and it wasn't fair to you, but i hope you are resting peacefully. whether or not you are watching over us, thank you, and i will continue to do my best. i hope during your last breath and your last heartbeat that you knew how much i love you. i am tempted to say that god killed you, that god took you from me, but at the very least you aren't in pain anymore. you will always have a place in my heart as my father, my caring, supportive parent, my mentor, my inspiration.
"He opened the jar of pickles when no one else could. He was the only one in the house who wasn't afraid to go into the basement by himself. He cut himself shaving, but no one kissed it or got excited about it. It was understood when it rained, he got the car and brought it around to the door. When anyone was sick, he went out to get the prescription filled. He took lots of pictures... but he was never in them."