About

Bluh bluh bluh....where to start? Okay, so....let's see. Now, I could say that I'm odd, but then again, this is Gaia. I don't think I'm God's best creation or anything really that special. I mean, yes, I do have a few talents, but nothing not seen before.....anyway.

So I like to write. I'm not that good or bad formwise, but one thing I'd say I'm good at is coming up with ideas. By sheer quantity, I mean. I've almost always got an idea running through my head. Getting them down, and working them out is harder. But I'm learning. Oh yes I'm learning. I like to learn new things.

I can be a bit mean. But I'm trying. I used to be a lot more spiteful, but I wholeheartedly admit I was in the wrong. And it doesn't get me anywhere. Any point worth making can be made politely, and rudeness cannot be fought with rudeness. Stare at the void and all that jazz.

I'm.....kinda agnostic? Well, not exactly. I don't hold, deep in my heart, and true conviction as to what god is. But I can't believe our world is cold and devoid of any spirit. Sure, it's illogical, but so is most of human experience. Funnily enough, I'll be majoring in Computer Science or Physics next year when I go to college (whichever I don't major in will be a minor). I do believe our world follows logical laws. I just don't see why they have to encompass everything. And at their deepest level, science and magic only differ in procedure.

As you maybe can tell, I like to pretend I'm philosophical. Hah, no, really, I just think a lot and ask a lot of questions. And that's all it takes, that's all that's needed. Well, hope I've interested you, I could always do with someone to talk with. Tah~

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-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 6:48 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Hahaha, more or less yeah! XD And I appreciate your view I really do, its to find people who actually see a sort of nuance in art XD My parents don't take me seriously, but oh well.
Its ok though, I know how it is XD But I think you're more funny than socially awkward. biggrin

And ok, it was really nice chatting with you! biggrin
Night!
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 6:39 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Oh very nice! biggrin I'm debating art school. XD I might just take some art classes at the local Community college.

And no you didn't hit a sour note XD You're funny biggrin
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 6:24 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

I couldn't agree more! biggrin
Aw thats a damn shame razz
Whats in Boston?
And I just realized that I forgot to get that off my profile. XD
I don't have a girlfriend anymore, but if I did, she would HAVE to be jealous biggrin
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 6:13 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

AHA! I'm not alone! XD
And personally, I'm not happy with myself either. I mean, I'm happy with the progress that I've made as a person, but I feel that my journey is far from over, ya know? But that's exactly what I was saying! biggrin Who knows what normal really is?!?! XD
Aw, that's too bad. I think you'd fit in wonderfully with my friends and I! biggrin
Whereabouts do you live? If you don't mind me asking?
I live in Laughlin, Nevada. Little gambling town on the river razz
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 5:57 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

I know exactly what you mean, especially about being 'conventional'. Where I live is a pretty small town, and the youth pretty much consists of 'scene kids', thatguy(shorts and shirt two sizes too big, always pretty pompous, hair spiked out as opposed to up, general a** hole and treats his girl like s**t), and closed minded superficial girls, usually spotted with that guy.
And as far as that goes, what exactly IS normal? Never in my life have I been exposed to anything I could call normalcy. XD I like myself the way I am. Like you said, I too am happy being myself, which is why I tossed the pot,. Like my 'problems'. They set me apart from all the other 'normal' people.
Haha and it's quite alright. My friends and I usually have deep hour long convo's like this one, but lately we've been busy XD We've not had time to talk for hours uninterrupted for a while so its nice to have a talk like this, especially with someone i just met!
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 5:34 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Haha, its funny though, because I was never professionally diagnosed. My step mother has had anxiety problems for a few years now, and she saw that I've been going through the same things she was, as far as lack of stability, self doubt, panic attacks and such go. Haha, the reason I brought that up is because I'm not what one would consider a conventional guy. I prefer the company of intellectual ladies, besides my brotherhood, to that of men, because I quite frankly don't like men. And you're very right. The children of this upcoming generation have quite a bit more to worry about than we did and do now. And I'd have to agree with you. Without my little brotherhood, I think the part of my mind that would prefer to sit around all day and indulge in getting high would've taken hold and I'd be a loser for the rest of my life XD And the same goes for the ability to question. Its played a particularly important role in my life, as well as helping me find MY role in the lives of others. biggrin
And I couldn't agree more!

-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 5:14 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Haha, I would say small world, but I thinking in today's society, social anxiety and depression seem to play a much larger roll in life than in our parents youth, and even moreso than our grandparents. Its not to say that they didn't experience it somewhat, but I think its even more the case for our generation because of whats expected of us, according to our schooling, gender, level of intellect and so forth.
Usually what helps me the best is talking about the reasons for my anxiety, and that of my close friends, and together we work out the possible causes and mental blocks that could cause the thoughts to reoccur. We started questioning our beliefs and such at sort of a young age, especially my brother friend donni. We were constantly being switched around in our classes and they board was always trying new methods of teaching with us, so we really didn't have much stability. Not to mention I quickly lost interest and starting falling behind. I digress.
That's a very beautiful way of wording it, though its really true!
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 4:55 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Haha, thank, but I'm far from enlightened. No matter how much I learn about the world outside my head, my anxiety will probably be the death of me. I don't know what it is but I've got this horrible self doubt that prevents me from accomplishing much. Lately, things have been different, but I still have it. XD This overwhelming feeling that I can't amount to anything and so on. I know its not true, but it does ******** with me :/
That's probably THE BIGGEST reason why I strive to learn and understand. I hope to find something that will help me understand every little aspect of myself. biggrin
-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 4:48 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Haha, very true.
The curiosity actually stemmed from prejudice. Someone made a really good point on an image board i frequent that I was just as ignorant for being prejudice towards Neo Nazi's and skinheads and such.
Seeing this as a personal weakness I did looked into and now I've got a slightly less prejudice view on it XD
I still don't see their methods as acceptable, but at the very least I know WHY most of them behave the way they do razz

-penguin- is a hobo

Report | 11/08/2009 4:40 pm

-penguin- is a hobo

Hahah, why thank you!
Its really...... patiece trying. Like, I was really curious why people would cling to what I see as ignorance and intolerance. So i scoured youtube for videos and googled everything I could think of related XD In a lot of situations its deeply based on pride of several generations of what they consider purity :O

I dunno, I've got proposterous amounts of patience and understanding XD

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When I die, I want to go surrounded by people who will never, ever, ride that rollercoaster ride again.