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KittySongLUVsJONASBoys on 10/01/2014

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Poems

Beautiful Feather
I'm weak and ugly,
I cannot fly,
Even with my name, Feather.

I'm kind and gentle,
But don't they see
My other name, Heart?

I feel so frail,
And terribly gnarled,
Like gray weather.

But he sat next to me,
And we laughed,
I didn't feel torn apart.

"You are beautiful."
The words rang out to me
Ever since wet sat together

Now I see that
I need not beauty,
But my name,
Featherheart.


By: Timecraze

I Get Along With The Voices Inside My Head

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KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 10/01/2014 8:45 am
HI!

It's your birthday! Happy Birthday! C:
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 06/22/2014 9:30 pm
So um... I was perusing through the forums and stuff, and saw that you seemed to be struggling for a layout?
cause you said you were gonna post if you could get a layout, and then stuff happened...
y'know, the place you posted was closed or summat?

So I made you one (:
It's in my test thread.
Alluring Fate Report | 06/13/2014 11:11 am
Gaia was correct, it was my birthday ^^ Thank you so much!
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 05/07/2014 5:33 pm
I did it... and I'll probably continue working on the rest tomorrow sometime...
unless something comes up.
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 05/07/2014 5:25 pm
yeah I can do that (:
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 03/27/2014 1:26 pm
Yeah; I'll try not to focus on it too much.

Thanks for everything c:

Do you like the first post?
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 03/25/2014 8:57 pm
Yeah, they do mean a lot to me. Besides that, my dad already is upset with our [my] cats - I was chatting to them earlier and I was saying how they're walking a very thin line. and I worry for the time when I won't be able to defend them; because the only reason we have cats, is because of me. and one day, I worry that I won't be able to use "being the youngest", or being "daddy's little girl" or even the only girl to my advantage anymore. Yeah; we had Rusty for six years. and yes, that's what I meant. that's what he does when that happens. or if God forbid, we have more kittens and no one wants them, then he does that sometimes. I prefer not to know, but the thing is, I know when my cats have kittens; so if I can't find them, I start imagining. Like, if it's winter, then the cold probably got them; but otherwise, I wonder... My feline friends hold a special place in my heart.

Yep. She's the one who is always smiling, and it hurt so much to watch her cry. Seriously, I'm surprised I didn't start bawling. My heart hurts so much when my friends are hurting, but even more so when there's nothing I can do for them. Thanks.. but no, it isn't easy. not in the slightest. I'm not sure about that, but I do know what I look for in a friend and what I think a good friend is, so I try to be that kind of person for my friends. Besides, it's just who I am; I can't be mean.

Yes... I guess I did say that.... And that too... And I guess she has said it more than once, I just... It feels like... I don't even know what it is that it feels like. I just know that I don't like it. And when they constantly do it; it hurts. Almost like they think I can't do it on my own. Like, I know I've been graduated for almost a year, but it's not my fault that we live near a small city that doesn't have a lot of jobs. especially jobs a shy person could do. I know, I've considered it; but my mom wouldn't like that very much at all... Then again, she wouldn't like it if I moved out either... Thanks for your faith in me, though.

My Little Pony? Don't worry, I'm not laughing. Guilty is charged, I watch the show [of my own free will]. My friends say I'm like Fluttershy. Like, to a tee. When we were watching the show one Saturday, every time they were talking about Fluttershy; instead of saying Fluttershy, they were saying Stephie. I guess I could try that, but what could I do that doesn't cost much? Because I kind of need a job to make a lot of the changes I'd like to. Thanks, I hope I find my own image soon too. I'm tired of looking like the pure, completely clean cut [like not even nail polish "clean cut"] girl my mom says I have to me.

Strength? You think I'm strong? That's not really what I would call myself...

Thanks Jezzy c: Really? You like hearing the stories? Sometimes I feel like I'm bragging when I tell the stories, that's why I stopped.

I realize, that I talk a lot about "my mom this" and "my mom that" and it's starting to sound like I'm making her out to be a monster. which she's not. she's this really sweet, soft-spoken woman. and I love and adore her to pieces. and despite everything, I would break if she was gone. I guess a lot has to do with that she grew up differently than me. and I know a lot of what she does is because she loves me and wants me to have a good life, and a job. but it doesn't always feel like it, y'know?

Thank you for listening [reading?]. I know my rl friends wouldn't mind me telling them this. But like... I feel like I'm pestering them when I do, and it's like... I don't want them to think of me differently, you know? Because I'm always the shoulder to cry on, I'm always there for them. So I feel like I'm not supposed to be weak? And I feel awkward crying in front of them, and I know that if I say these things out loud, I will cry. And I know it's silly, but it's true.
So thank you.
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 03/25/2014 6:40 pm
Not really...

You know my cat, Rusty, the broad shouldered cat who I said was a softie?
Well my parents said he was too sick
[he really didn't look that bad, just a little mangy. but it didn't seem like he was suffering or anything]
and so my dad... y'know, got rid of him.

And then I found out that my one friend, the "ham" one.
she's the only one in her family who has a job because her mom's work kept lying to her about why they wouldn't let her put her mum into the nursing home.
and on top of her being the only source of income, her dad has some pretty advanced [prostate?] cancer,
and she said that the doctors said that he won't be here by this time next year.
So my heart just really hurts for her.

And then there's the whole "I still don't have a job" thing.
It's fine if my parents don't mention it.
But when they start talking about me not having a job, or why I don't.
Or "you should just apply here" or "none of that, 'I'm too shy' stuff"
then I start feeling like I'm pretty worthless and a sorry excuse for a daughter.
I mean, my brothers all got jobs relatively quickly. And then there's me.
Like, the only reason [right now, or the main one at least]
that I want to get a job is so that I can better take care of my cats in the way my parent's refuse to.
Because they don't believe in taking a cat to the vet or spending money on pets for things other than food.

I don't mind being shy, it's just... I don't know how to "assert" myself, and my confidence is pretty much nonexistent.
I think it has some to do with my image.
Like, I don't want to seriously change or whatever, but I don't feel comfortable in my own skin.
Right now, I look like the girl my mom wants. Not necessarily what I want.
This look doesn't feel like me, you know?
So I don't have a problem with being shy, I've come to terms with my shyness...
But, y'know...

wow, this is kind of long...
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 03/25/2014 6:26 pm
It's not a problem.
I don't have much to do anyway...
KittySongLUVsJONASBoys Report | 03/25/2014 6:23 pm
I could do the coding as well c:

I'll get right on that. and if nothing pops up in my schedule, I should have it for you this week sometime.
 

Well Hello There!

Music--n--Love--4-Life's avatar

Registered: 04/02/2009

Gender: Female

Birthday: 10/01

dot dot dot

Hey there, the name's Jezerette. Though please call me Music unless I give you permission otherwise.
I am married to my lovely husband as of 3 July 2011
Now, I'm not going to say anything else about me except for this:
As of October 1, I am twenty-three years young.

If you would like to know things about me, just ask. I don't bite; not hard anyways c:

As of July 20, 2012; I have a baby girl. Her name is Cari.


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