Can cannibals be vegetarians?
For all I know, I could be eating cat liver !!!
Night has chosen thee; thy death will be thy birth. Night calls to thee; hearken to Her sweet voice. Your destiny awaits you at the House of Night !!!
Donations of any kind are much appreciated,
and you will be forever loved. And I mean it.
LOVE THE TWILIGHT SAGA !!!
YOU KNOW THOSE LITTLE LIZARDZ !?!
Automatic doors and toilets make me feel like a JEDI.
Vampires ... Gotta love them Cullen boys.
You asked what was wrong and I smiled and said NOTHING. Then I turned around to walk away and said, EVERYTHING.
Who needs Dracula when you have Edward Cullen ?!
I was looking up at the stars....and giving them each a reason why I love you.....I was doing great until I ran out of stars.
^^Live above the influence^^
I'm not retarted ....
I just like licking windows.
Ronald McDonald eats babiez !!!
Most people are like SLINKIES, basically useless, yet it is so amusing to watch them fall down the stairs.
It's not PMS; it's just you.
I realized how much I love him when I was laying in bed last night, thinking he didn't love me.
Mrs. Epinosa wants to EAT meet you
Please don't throw your cigarette ends on the floor,
the cockroaches are getting cancer.
Dinosaurs aren't extinct; they're just hiding.
Angry people need hugs
(or sharp objects)
Everyday is yesterday, according to tomorrow.
REDNECK WEDDING VOW
til huntin' season
do us part
Like old people...
but BETTER !!!
I love to walk in the rain because no one can see me cry.
Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
I'm not as think as you dumb I am.
Life is random ...
So am I.
I don't forgive people because I'm weak I forgive them because I'm strong enough to know that everyone makes mistakes.
The only people you need in your life are
the ones that need you in theirs.
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems.....
Ish liek a shircle. Not a wrectangew or a twriangew, cuz you know those have places where you shtop. Ish liek a shircle.
If you love someone tell them. Broken hearts are often caused by unspoken words.
My heart is bleeding.
My eyez are crying.
I like to watch fish float.
At least I can walk away knowing I did nothing wrong; that I gave it my all and you failed me, I didn't fail myself.
I'm just your avarage everyday
I love to watch meat roll.
Poking your eye isn't considered a contact sport.
I'd rather talk to spahgetti than watch a movie.
When you light catz on fire, they pop. Seriously.
My dad's favorite childhood memory
was running through the daisies, naked.
It's too bad that was the other day.
Bubbles Bubbles Bubbles ...
MY BUBBLES !!!
Catz taste like chicken,
Dogz taste like ice cream.
Until the day I die, I spill my heart for you.
Come to the dark side...
We have cookies.
Don't drink water....
Fish have sex in it.
Berore you, Bella, my life was a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars - points of light and reason ... And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn't see the stars anymore, and there was no more reason for anything. - Edward Cullen
Oh hot damn,
Dis is my jam.
A purring cat sounds like it's on vibrate.
Have you ever noticed how SQUISHY your eye ball is?
Shampoo is not a bevrage.
People think I'm and insane driver....
I beg to differ.
I don't know what CAFFINE does for you,
but I'm pretty sure without it,
your head caves in.
People who think Thursday is the new Friday, have serious mental problems.
I called your boyfriend gay
and he hit me with his purse.
I may not be much,
but I'm excellent at pretending to be a ninja.
I'm the kind of girl who will
burst out laughing in the
dead of silence about something
that happened yesterday.
Papa Smurf exploded.
Why does Sponge Bob have 14 fingers?
Twilight ... Giving hope to clumsy girls everywhere.
P.S. If I have something on here you don't like, please don't hate me.
I'm just immature.
from little babies,
cuz I'm a REAL MAN !!!
A friend would bail you out of jail.
Your best friend would be sitting next to you saying,
"DAMN, that was fun."
It's not nice to stab someone in the back or side without saying "Excuse me."
Pull your head out of you a** and
take a walk in their shoes.
You're just jelous 'cuz the voices are
talking to ME.
What color do smurfs turn when their choking?
Boys break hearts, so why don't you break
Even the tears rolling down my face don't say much.
I suffer so you don't have to;
You shouldn't have to.
I got singing lessons from Fred.
I can promise you that I'm always thinking about you.
I'm gonna live like I can fly,
I'm gonna laugh until I cry.
Sometimes you just gotta let go of what makes you happy.
God made us best friends because He knew our moms couldn't handle us as sisters.
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
When I grow up I wanna be just like me.
When I grow up I wanna be just like me.
They laugh at me because I'm different.
I laugh at them 'cause they're all the same.
Trying to explain how much I love you is like trying to nail jello to a tree. Completly IMPOSSIBLE !!!
Tears are words from the heart that can't be spoken.
May the force be with you ...
Have you seen how short Tinker Bell's dress is?
Swimming at a pool party is now illegal.
Watching the ripples in water makes me
wanna go pee.
"STOP TYPING LIKE YOU ARE SLAMING YOUR FOREHEAD ONTO THE KEYBOARD. Ex: i ahm sew cewl cuz i typ liek disssssss ..."
1: Place four cans of WD40 in the MICROWAVE.
2: Set to ten minutes.
3: Run like hell.
I find all kind of stuff on Gaia and the internet in general.
Got a quote? I'll put it on here.
Yes I do ...
Threaten my computer, tell the TV what to do,
yell at my hairbrush, and talk to things that can't talk back,
And you still love me !!!
You look like you just got slapped
by a big bag of WTF.
Forgetting you is hard to do. Forgetting me is up to you. Forget me not,
forget me never, but don't forget, we're great together.
Emmett Cullen makes Superman look like a girl scout.
Some people blame our generation,
but have they ever stopped to think
who raised us ???
Letters start with ABC,
Numbers start with 123,
Songs start with do - re - me,
And love starts with you and me.
I'm the girl your mother
warned you about. ;]
Emmett Cullen eats the Jonas Brothers for a midnight snack.
So here's to ...
the crap we talk, the guyz we stalk, the way we shop,
laughs we can't stop, the gossip we spill, the looks that could kill,
we'll stay together cuz we're best friends forever !!!
Caution: Provoking the Volturi may lead to painful and sudden death.
My friends are the kind that if the house was burning down, they would be making smores and hitting on the firemen.
I hear vioces in my head
and you think you're a freak ???
The real reason I loved seeing the Twilight movie in theaters:
it was a night of yelling "THAT'S NOT HOW IT HAPPENED !!!" and throwing popcorn at the screen with all my friends.
Jacob Black is too sexy for his shirt.
Only a vampire can love you forever.
Having a vampire boyfriend may be hazardous to your health. (Not that you care ;] )
I'm the type of girl that
turns the music up way loud,
just to tune out reality.
Those nights you can't sleep,
You just might be in someone else's dreams.
Damn right I'm good in bed ...
I can sleep for days.
If you read Twilight, you wouldn't shut up either.
I promise you no matter what
happens, when you look back,
I'll always be there.
Real girls are never afraid to be truely over the top.
I feel like riding a wild bull off the rainbow of tranquility.
I want a boy who I can run to with tears running down my face
and the first thing he says is ... Whose a** am I kicking, Babe?
I've built a wall not to block anyone out, but to see who loves me enought to clomb over it.
Your real friends see the tears before they fall.
You'll be fine. All you have to do is put on this vest of broken glass and sit on the chair of death.
I don' have a short attention span, I just ...
Oh, look a KITTY !!!
I never got my Hogwarts letter so I'm moving to Forks to live with the Cullens.
I run after Volvos screaming "BITE ME !!!"
You can thank your lucky stars that everything I wish for will never come true.
If it didn't matter you wouldn't be thinking about it.
I purposely create awkward moments because I think it's funny.
I love people who give me big hugz.
Hold me close ...
and promise to never let me go.
All I want to do is fall asleep in your arms and wake up to the warmth of your body next to mine.
Edward Cullen is for women what sex is for men -
on our minds every 7 seconds.
Does my being half-naked bother you?
Yes, take the other half off, please !?!
Girls wiht boobs like mine don't talk to boys with faces like yours.
Chuck Norris wears Emmett Cullen pajamas.
I like my boys cold, dead, and sparkling.
I run with scissors.
It makes me feel dangerous.
Blondes may have all the fun, but Edward likes brunettes.
I'm not perfect, I'll annoy you, piss you off, say stupid stuff, and then take it back, but put that all aside, you'll never find a girl that cares and loves you more that me.
You haven't read Twilgiht?
Go shoot yourself in the foot.
When I die I want to go peacefully like my grandpa did, in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
In that instant, I felt well. Whole. I could feel my heart racing in my chest, the blood pulsing hot and fast throught my veins again. My lungs filled deep with the sweet scent
that radiated off his skin. It was like there had never been any hole in my chest. I was perfect - not healed, but as if there had never been a wound in the first place.
Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget.
Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the
pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.
Oh, please. I don't turn heads, I ******** break necks.
CAUTION Water on road during rain.
How come you have enough time to go out and make other people fall in love with you,
but you don't have enough time to pay attention to the one who already does?
My friends are pretty awesome.
I'm a sucker for guys in EYELINER.
Did you eat a bowl of STUPID for
Mommy always said, "Tables were made
for glasses, not for ---"
I found out if a girl asks you how she looks compared to another girl ... when that other girl is there staring at you with "I'll kill you" eyes, there isn't much you can do.
How guyz get out of a chick fight (it would be easy to have the following set-up):
1)Sorry, I wouldn't know; I'm gay
2)Johnny Depp has a nice a**, I'd say
3)James? We aren't dating it wouldn't work out
4)Brad Pitt kicks Tommy Lee's a**
I don't like it when you squeeze my face.
25 fun things to do in an elevator!
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.
5. Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
6. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
7. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
8. Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
9. Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
10. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
11. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
12. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
13. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"
15. Swat at flies that don't exist.
16. Tell people that you can see their aura.
17. Call out, "Group Hug!" and then enforce it.
18. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
19. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
20. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
22. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passergers.
23. Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
24. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25. Stare, grinning
Even if you love me, or if you hate me. You'll be thinking of me.
I stay up all night waiting for Edward to jump through my window.
I'll name all my kids after the Cullens.
Ballet studios give me the chills.
I went to the doctor's yesterday, and I asked how Edward was doing.
My doctor's new name is Carlisle.
Popsicles are my new favorite treat; cold, hard, sweet
One day Edward heard me thinking of him ...
and he blushed like a school girl.
1. Kiss on the hand = I adore you
2. Kiss on the cheek = I just want to be friends
3. Kiss on the neck = I want you
4. Kiss on the lips = I love you
5. Kiss on the ears = I am just playing
6. Kiss anywhere else = lets not get carried away
7. Look in your eyes = kiss me
8. Playing with your hair = I can't live without you
9. Hand on your waist = I love you to much to let you go
The Three Steps:
1. Girls If any guys gets fresh with you, slap him.
2. Guys If any girl slaps you, her intentions are still good.
3. Guys and Girls Close your eyes when kissing, it is rude to stare.
1. Thou shall not squeeze too hard.
2. Thou shall not ask for a kiss, but take one.
3. Thou shall kiss at every opportunity.
Here are a few reasons why guys like girls:
1. They will always smell good even if its just shampoo
2. The way they call you after you just had a big fight.
3. The way she says 'lets not fight anymore' even though you know that an hour later....
4. The way they kiss when you do something nice for them
5. The way they kiss you when you say 'I love you'
6. Actually ... just the way they kiss you...
7. The way they fall into your arms when they cry
8. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly
9. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
10. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt.
11. The way they say 'I miss you'
12. The way you miss them
13. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore.....
GIRLS, THE COMEBACKS WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR!!:
>Man: Where have you been all my life?
>Woman: Hiding from you.
>Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
>Man: Is this seat empty?
>Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
>Man: Your place or mine?
>Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
>Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
>Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>Woman: Do not enter.
>Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>Man: Your body is like a temple.
>Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
>Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
>Woman: But would you stay there?
>Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
>Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
>Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
-When she walks away from you mad = [Follow her]
-When she stares at your lips = [Kiss her]
-When she pushes you or hits you = [Grab her and don't let go]
-When she starts cursing at you = [Kiss her and tell her you love her]
-When she's quiet = [Ask her what's wrong]
-When she ignores you = [Give her your attention]
-When she pulls away = [Pull her back]
-When you see her at her worst = [Tell her she's beautiful]
-When you see her start crying = [Just hold her and don't say a word]
-When you see her walking = [Sneak up and hug her waist from behind]
-When she's scared = [Protect her]
-When she lays her head on your shoulder = [Tilt her head up and kiss her]
-When she steals your favorite hat = [Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night]
-When she teases you = [Tease her back and make her laugh]
-When she doesn't answer for a long time = [reassure her that everything is okay]
-When she looks at you with doubt = [Back yourself up with the TRUTH]
-When she says that she loves you =[she really does more than you could understand]
-When she grabs at your hands = [Hold her's and play with her fingers]
-When she bumps into you = [bump into her back and make her laugh]
-When she tells you a secret = [keep it safe and untold]
-When she looks at you in your eyes = [don't look away until she does]
-WHEN SHE MISSES YOU = [SHES HURTING INSIDE]
-When you break her heart = [the pain NEVER really goes away]
-When she says its over = [she STILL wants you to be hers]
- Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything
-DON'T let her have the last word
-NEVER call her hot
-Pretty and beautiful is SO much better
-Say you love her more than she could ever love you
- Argue that she is the best girl ever
-When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
-When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her
-Because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
-Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
-Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
-Treat her like she's all that matters to you
-Tease her and let her tease you back
-Stay up all night with her when she's sick
-Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
-Give her the world
-Let her wear your clothes
-When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
-Let her know she's important
-Kiss her in the pouring rain
Drink coffee - do dumb things faster with more energy.
Pickles are cucumbers soaked in evil.
I can watch hundreds of horror movies and not get scared. But when the toast pops out of the toaster ... all hell breaks loose.
It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure ...