Some topics that are very important to me, ones which I think of quite often.
[size=11]That sounds like a rewarding career! I'm glad it also comes with job security, that can be hard to come by now a days! I'm sure you'll just slay grad school. You're so smart and focused.
You'll be past it and working in no time! I'm still a little upset I didn't start school right away but I honestly feel like I've found my purpose as a mom. So many people look down on stay at home moms saying they are just "lazy so they don't get a job" Really, its a full time job and your breaks aren't regulated by a manager they are when your child sleeps, if you're alert enough to even do anything, that is.
I would much prefer to do what I love and maybe pick up a weekend job to make ends meet. Ideally I want to run an animal rescue, or at least work/volunteer at one. Jordan (my boyfriend) makes good money at his job its just a matter of waiting it out until he can manage a raise again and we can finally have our own place. I hate having roommates. I keep everything so clean having other people trash things and be sloppy and just... I hate it so much.
Anyway, getting off topic! It really is incredible how much we've changed and in how short a time span. I look at Jordan and I feel like we've hardly ever been apart but in reality its only been 3 years. Just... with how much has happened it feels like 10. I don't know how to describe it really. Time flies, but at the same time it drags on and on. Pregnancy felt like 2 years it was so terrible. I've moved a bunch of times, changed jobs, destroyed my body for this child... How can that only happen in just 3 years? Just insane. We used to look up to "grown ups" and now here we are being looked up to by young kids thinking "Oh no don't do that I have no idea wtf is going on"
Parenting, motherhood... I thought high school was hard? Quinn is about 3 months old and its all been harder than the entire high school experience combined. First of all my pregnancy was awful. Constant heartburn, she kicked me like a demon since 16 weeks (when my doctor would take her heartrate the kid would be kicking so much she just assumed all was fine, she was that active. While I was in labor she kept squirming and kicking the heartrate monitor off of her she never EVER sat still) OH AND LABOR, THATS ANOTHER THING.
I wanted an all natural birth. HAHAhahaHAshahaha.... 16 hours in I begged for the epidural. Got the drugs and labor was 24 hours total. Just insane. She was born may 15th at 1:11am. Amazingly I only had to push for 59 minutes. With how long I took to dilate I was terrified of pushing. Then after that we struggled with breastfeeding. She just could NOT latch and she made me bleed and favored one side so that one was super engorged while the other produced next to nothing. She lost a lot of weight after birth and then was terribly jaundiced so we had to bring her back every single day for the first week to have her foot stabbed for a blood sample to make sure her levels weren't too high. I supplemented with formula to try and get her weight back up and tried to give my boobs time to heal but the very first time I tried to nurse her again there was so much blood I gave up completely. She was basically getting blood and a side of milk. Come to find out a few weeks ago she has a tounge tie the nurses and lactation nurse missed and thats why she couldn't nurse. Still upset about that, but shes healthy..
The whole time I was failing at breastfeeding I was terribly depressed. Horribly. Never been more depressed in my entire life depressed. Postpartum depression is NOT something to ******** around with. I was not okay for probably the whole first month after birth......
Right now things are finally a bit better and settling down. Just terrified for teething soon because we'll go right back around with inconsolable baby....
I guess long LONG story short... I love being a parent, not having a baby. The physical act of carrying a child, birthing it, feeding... it is so hard. But I love
Steam Username: Linvy