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Johannes Cabal's avatar

Location: On the Run

Occupation: Necromancer

The Crimes of Johannes Cabal

Johannes Cabal and the Blustery Day (Short Story)

Exeunt Demon King
(Short Story)

The Ereshkigal Working (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Necromancer (Novel)

The House of Gears (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Detective (Novel)

The Death of Me (Short Story)

A Long Spoon (Short Story)

Ouroboros Ouzo (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Fear Institute (Novel)

The Brothers Cabal (Novel)


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Armed and Dangerous


Biography of a Necromancer

Imagine, if you will, dear visitor: A pale tow-headed man of about six feet tall, in his late twenties, dressed sensibly in black from head to toe. He carries with him a Gladstone bag, containing, among other things, the following: a set of precise surgical scalpels, his late father's silver matchbox, what appears to be a padded case that contains various elixers and potions from his experimentations, a switchblade, whatever tome he's stolen from a private collection, and most certainly, a Webley .577 revolver. Various exotic tokens and ritualistic devices can often be found in his bag as well.

He speaks in a British manner, but has a faint Teutonic accent. If you were able, perchance, to get a glimpse of his eyes beyond his smoke-tinted glasses, you would find them to be blue. But if you were to look past the color, you might, at times, find them to be tired, sharp, or most distressingly, absolutely soulless.

Johannes Cabal is the main character of the same named series by author Jonathan L. Howard. A scientist who studies the illegal art of Necromancy in a world similar to ours, past adventures include: Stopping the zombie apocalypse; staying in on a rather dreary day; running an evil carnival to gather 100 wayward souls for Satan in return for his own, with the assistance of his vampire brother Horst; solving a series of political murders to stop a war caused by a power hungry military. He approaches life with the philosophy that death is mankind's greatest enemy (well, besides its own stupidity.) He's willing to do anything to achieve his goals, whatever the cost, be it blood, money, or his own soul.

The Necromancer, Himself


As you wish.

One Johannes Cabal, necromancer (of some little infamy,) detective, blasphemer, grave pilferer, carnival proprietor, and overall, a lying, cheating b*****d.
(In the sense of the insult; My father was an upstanding gentleman, if you will.)

Hates: I don't hate, I have extreme dis-likings.

Dislikes: Small children, large children, elderly people, revenants who refuse to co-operate, mobs, angry villagers, angry relatives of the recently deceased, getting stuck in timeless dimensions, Leonie Barrow, killing, being forced to kill, people generally in my way, political intrigue, demons with nothing better to do than whine at me, Horst's similies (Why. Why are they always sexual?) carnivals, being forced to run a carnival to get my soul back, having to claim 100 souls for Satan (Who knew you needed your own for necromancy? Go figure...), slobbering guard dogs, social interaction, etc....

On Heroics:

"I do almost everything for reasons that might be characterized as selfish. I regard my life as a vital thread in the ongoind march of humanity from protoplasm to-- I don't know, to be honest. Something better than protoplasm would be a start. Therefore, anything that threatens my life now or later has to be dealt with. Paradoxically, that often means risking my life to secure my safety. The difference is that I risk it on my own terms."

Insults, slurs, and cries of revenge

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Rhea Byrne Report | 05/16/2015 6:46 pm
Rhea Byrne
Hopefully they do.
Mom(well, technically my grandma made it for mom) made him liver and onions today, so hopefully that cheers him up a bit.
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/16/2015 6:29 pm
Rhea Byrne
He's doing a little better. They were thinking he might lose another toe, but it's looking better, so there's a chance it could be saved.
They did accidentally nick an artery scraping his foot though.
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/16/2015 6:23 pm
Rhea Byrne

I hope so too. Mom did take him to the hospital to see dad yesterday, and that cheered dad up a bit. (and the nurses. xD)
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/16/2015 6:16 pm
Rhea Byrne
Augh, I hate when that happens. Drink some tea if you have any?

I'm okay, missing fuzzbutt and hoping mom brings him tomorrow (even though it means I'll have to get up at like 6 to keep him busy.
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/16/2015 6:00 pm
Rhea Byrne
Yooo, how's it going?
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/10/2015 9:22 pm
Rhea Byrne
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/10/2015 9:10 pm
Rhea Byrne
Thankfully, the movie finished and the next one was a repeat, so I took that as a sign to turn the tv off and go to the back bedroom. (It's nice having stable wifi in bed) So now it's a matter of working on a building project in starbound(working on a home base for my unstable beta character) or terraria (mostly likely colored fountains like this one.) or something action-y like Isaac or Necrodancer
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/10/2015 9:01 pm
Rhea Byrne
Hopefully I'm up next time it hits. xD

Man, I keep meaning to go lie down, but interesting movies keep coming on on a channel I don't get in the room.
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/10/2015 8:46 pm
Rhea Byrne
Probably. I bet they'll do it again though, it sunk half the gold the loyal's gates sink.
Rhea Byrne Report | 05/10/2015 8:29 pm
Rhea Byrne
It's part of the 'event' Alchemy and fishing both are getting updates. Plus gofusion

And there was a gold to GC rig in the shop for a bit that I was kinda bummed I missed, since I was sitting on a fair chunk of gold. xP


"The best scientist is open to experience and begins with romance
-- the idea that anything is possible." -R. Bradbury


"I sound quite mythical, don't I? What wonders shallI perform next?"