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Johannes Cabal's avatar

Location: On the Run

Occupation: Necromancer

The Crimes of Johannes Cabal

Johannes Cabal and the Blustery Day (Short Story)

Exeunt Demon King
(Short Story)

The Ereshkigal Working (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Necromancer (Novel)

The House of Gears (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Detective (Novel)

The Death of Me (Short Story)

A Long Spoon (Short Story)

Ouroboros Ouzo (Short Story)

Johannes Cabal the Fear Institute (Novel)

The Brothers Cabal (Novel)


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Armed and Dangerous


Biography of a Necromancer

Imagine, if you will, dear visitor: A pale tow-headed man of about six feet tall, in his late twenties, dressed sensibly in black from head to toe. He carries with him a Gladstone bag, containing, among other things, the following: a set of precise surgical scalpels, his late father's silver matchbox, what appears to be a padded case that contains various elixers and potions from his experimentations, a switchblade, whatever tome he's stolen from a private collection, and most certainly, a Webley .577 revolver. Various exotic tokens and ritualistic devices can often be found in his bag as well.

He speaks in a British manner, but has a faint Teutonic accent. If you were able, perchance, to get a glimpse of his eyes beyond his smoke-tinted glasses, you would find them to be blue. But if you were to look past the color, you might, at times, find them to be tired, sharp, or most distressingly, absolutely soulless.

Johannes Cabal is the main character of the same named series by author Jonathan L. Howard. A scientist who studies the illegal art of Necromancy in a world similar to ours, past adventures include: Stopping the zombie apocalypse; staying in on a rather dreary day; running an evil carnival to gather 100 wayward souls for Satan in return for his own, with the assistance of his vampire brother Horst; solving a series of political murders to stop a war caused by a power hungry military. He approaches life with the philosophy that death is mankind's greatest enemy (well, besides its own stupidity.) He's willing to do anything to achieve his goals, whatever the cost, be it blood, money, or his own soul.

The Necromancer, Himself


As you wish.

One Johannes Cabal, necromancer (of some little infamy,) detective, blasphemer, grave pilferer, carnival proprietor, and overall, a lying, cheating b*****d.
(In the sense of the insult; My father was an upstanding gentleman, if you will.)

Hates: I don't hate, I have extreme dis-likings.

Dislikes: Small children, large children, elderly people, revenants who refuse to co-operate, mobs, angry villagers, angry relatives of the recently deceased, getting stuck in timeless dimensions, Leonie Barrow, killing, being forced to kill, people generally in my way, political intrigue, demons with nothing better to do than whine at me, Horst's similies (Why. Why are they always sexual?) carnivals, being forced to run a carnival to get my soul back, having to claim 100 souls for Satan (Who knew you needed your own for necromancy? Go figure...), slobbering guard dogs, social interaction, etc....

On Heroics:

"I do almost everything for reasons that might be characterized as selfish. I regard my life as a vital thread in the ongoind march of humanity from protoplasm to-- I don't know, to be honest. Something better than protoplasm would be a start. Therefore, anything that threatens my life now or later has to be dealt with. Paradoxically, that often means risking my life to secure my safety. The difference is that I risk it on my own terms."

Insults, slurs, and cries of revenge

View All Comments

Jade King LOVES Report | 01/13/2017 10:41 pm
Jade King LOVES
Jade King LOVES Report | 01/13/2017 10:34 pm
Jade King LOVES
So nice of you! Your help for me will in turn impact my client a lot more! I can see him improving his communication skills with those awesome visuals in particular, since they look so fun and are such high-interest topics for him. When this little guy strings together 2-3 word combinations or utters multisyllabic words while talking about Star Wars, I'll have you to thank!
Jade King LOVES Report | 01/13/2017 10:23 pm
Jade King LOVES
AHHH thank you so much for the great tips, Johannes!! I just spent a good while poking around Wookiepedia and checking out Gurihiru!! Gurihuru's art style makes for really fun and engaging visuals; I've pulled some of their images to use as visual stimuli for conversation, describing, and generating utterances. I think my 4-yo is going to LOVE it!!! You're so kind for sharing, I really appreciate it! 4laugh
Elysion Dawning Report | 01/04/2017 7:54 am
Elysion Dawning
Thanks for the tip. I'm normally fine with dolls, but a few photos of the ones I'm looking into are just a little too creepy. smile
Majikina Report | 12/26/2016 3:32 am
Wanted to wish you a merry Christmas~ <3
Rhea Byrne Report | 11/15/2016 4:00 pm
Rhea Byrne
Maybe we'll get lucky in the future.
Rhea Byrne Report | 11/15/2016 1:04 pm
Rhea Byrne
Okay, that arm mod is beautiful.
Valyxara Report | 11/06/2016 3:33 pm
You definitely can! And like I've seen some pretty baseless crap in the discourse in general, but that... I just... They were literally reaching for the stars on this one. Just yikes.
Maze Report | 10/30/2016 10:58 am
Yeah, I tend to disappear for days years on end and then suddenly crop up again. I like to think I have a healthy balance with life and online stufings, but sometimes I'll lean more towards one rather than the other. And puzzle games are good for distracting people, I agree. I have many in my immediate environment who will stare at their screens for games, apparently lost in whatever puzzle world they are working on.

And I'm thankfully thickskinned enough that other people don't keep me from posting. *grins* I understand not everyone is, though, so if I do something that makes you anxious or that you don't like, feel free to just tell me. I'm probably not going to notice on my own, because this is online, and I have difficulty reading between the lines here.
Maze Report | 10/30/2016 3:13 am
I am sure others have made this known to you by now, but it is good to see you again.


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"I sound quite mythical, don't I? What wonders shallI perform next?"