Unfortunately, I'm still socially awkward.
Heed my words, mortal! I have much I wish to tell you. I bring you stories of the gods, as well as my divine words of wisdom. Listen well and heed me and you shall be rewarded in the next life. Ignore my words and your backside shall know my sandal.
I am storms, wild and untamable. I am the desert, encompassing and unforgiving. I am wild beasts, eyes and ears in all corners of existence. I am Sutekh, lord of the red lands...
...And I have risen.