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MY VIENS ARE CRACKED,
MY FRIENDS DON'T GIVE A ********,
THERE AREN'T ANY STARS IN MY SKY
AND EVERYTHING HAS BEEN BLACK FOR AS LONG
AS I CAN REMEMBER.

XXX

 
 
dream beam

emotion_smilies/icon_bandaid.pngAt 19, I read a sentence that re-terraformed my head:

“The level of matter in the universe has been constant since the Big Bang.”

In all the aeons we have lost nothing, we have gained nothing - not a speck,

not a grain, not a breath. The universe is simply a sealed, twisting kaleidoscope

that has reordered itself a trillion trillion trillion times over.

Each baby, then, is a unique collision - a cocktail, a remix - of all that has

come before: made from molecules of Napoleon and stardust and comets and

whale tooth; colloidal mercury and Cleopatra’s breath: and with the same

darkness that is between the stars between, and inside, our own atoms.

When you know this, you suddenly see the crowded top deck of the bus,

in the rain, as a miracle: this collection of people is by way of a starburst

constellation. Families are bright, irregular-shaped nebulae. Finding a person

you love is like galaxies colliding. We are all peculiar, unrepeatable,

perambulating micro-universes - we have never been before and we will

never be again. Oh God, the sheer exuberant, unlikely face of our existences.

The honour of being alive. They will never be able to make you again.

Don’t you dare waste a second of it thinking something better

will happen when it ends. Don’t you dare.

- Caitlin Moran