Lots of ups and downs. Got a new job some months ago. Very happy with it. But my significant other had to drive back to his hometown to take care of his mother so I've been on my own for seven months now. That's hard as ********. We talk everyday, but I'm more physically dependent than I first thought. I've fallen back into self harm. Got sick on a recent vacation to see my SO. Was in the hospital. IV antibiotics for two weeks. 103 degree fever. Blood in my urine. Scary stuff. Better now, but not back to normal. Major ups and downs.