Dear Periodic Table,
I see you've forgotten about me.
Sincerely, The Element of Surprise...
Dear Harry Potter,
We have a colorless odorless liquid that makes people tell the truth too. Except we don't call it Veritaserum, we call it Vodka.
Dear student whose paper I'm looking at,
I quote; "i thnk abraham linkin was som rndom guy, i guess. idk. he hd a funny ht. he shood c som1 abut tht............"
Sincerely, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
OM NOM NOM.
Sincerely, gas pump.
Sorry it took soooooo long to find you. Everywhere we looked there were pipes and mushrooms. I'm pretty sure we were stoned the whole time!
Sincerely, Mario and Luigi
We agree. Now get out of the kitchen so real men can cook.
Sincerely, Epic Meal Time.
You complete me
You're called Music Television, not Pregnant Teen Television
Sincerely, I don't care about 15 year olds who got knocked up, I came here for the music.
I don't care if you weigh 3000 pounds. I don't care if I break both wrists and forearms carrying all of you in.
Sincerely, I WILL NOT MAKE A SECOND TRIP.
Dear monsters in the closet,
It's cool with me if you're gay.
Sincerely, come on out.
Dear cough syrup,
No. You do not taste like grape. You taste like death and tears of small children. Not grape.
Dear graduated cylinder,
You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.
I'm younger, not less significant.
Sincerely, respect is a two-way road
Don't I get a say on whether I'm a planet or not? I think I know more about myself then you do.
Thanks for whistling the death march from Star Wars while handing out our exams.
Sincerely, student that is going to fail
Dear teachers, (en vooral meneer van schaik)
We really love it when you tell stories that last the whole class time.
Don't cry over spilled milk. Unless of course it is chocolate milk.
Dear fellow students,
Ever notice studying is 'student' and 'dying' put together?
Sincerely, I find this accurate.
Please don't take this too hard, but...
Sincerely, you were adopted.
Dear Marching Band,
We, the percussion section, are the only section that doesn't blow...
Sincerely, ...we bang!
"I was at work all day!" is not a valid excuse to make me do stuff for you.
Sincerely, I was at school all day. At least you get paid.
Dear girl I like,
Don't be concerned if a fat man puts you in a bag.
Sincerely, all I want for Christmas is you.
Dear 2000 word essay,
So, if I turn in 2 pictures, it doesn't count?
Sincerely, was worth a try...
If life gives you cookie dough... EAT IT RAW!
Sincerely, lemons are overrated
Dear people who are on no carb diets,
I hope you realize that fruits, veggies, and dairy are all carbohydrates.
Sincerely, maybe you should take 9th grade biology again.
Dear duct tape,
Please tell me, if silence is golden, then why are you silver?
Sincerely, a confused kidnapper.
Dear Edward Cullen,
How exactly did you get Bella preggo? I thought you didn't have blood...
Dear people using the Bible to "support" their ignorant and hateful opinions,
THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
Dear Microsoft Word,
That's a word, I swear!
Sincerely, science student