There's nothing to apologize about, I wasn't actually expecting any feedback. xD
The way I see it, taking a step towards trying to express your real self is always a step in the right direction, even if it's just online for now. As long as you continue to work towards progressing yourself forward, you're doing good. Learning how to keep your own sense of self-worth independent of how others think and feel, this will be your ultimate victory. Just remember that it's okay to get embarrassed. None of us are immune to that.