Today marks day 1 of my preparation for your arrival and the day is proving to be long and tiresome..
It's hard returning here. Returning to a life online. I have been here for days and I still feel lost and out of place. The house is lonely and cold...I miss the comforting warmth of being near you. You've walked me through your life for months now and the experience has awakened a new ache inside me. An acknowledgement that you're part of this wonderful place and community that I'm not a part of..I only get to taste what it might be like. I can only dream and hope to someday be able to wake up knowing I never have to leave again.
Until then..I will continue to push on leaving parts of me there with you to keep my presence alive.
Your smile hides it well, but I know it's hard for you too. But we'll get through this..Christmas is just around the corner and I'm determined to make it one to remember.