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- 11/27/2009 10:34 am
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- 03/19/2007
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Quote of the *insert increment of time here*"What can't be cured
Must be endured"
"There are many worlds.
But they share the same sky.
One sky, one destiny"
Avis
Rest in me and I'll comfort you
I have lived and I died for you
Abide in me and I vow to you
I will never forsake you
Do what makes you happy
Be with who makes you smile
Laugh as much as you breathe
And love as long as you live.
A girl and a guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle.
Girl: slow down I’m scared.
Guy: no this is fun.
Girl: no it's not please it's way to scary!
Guy: then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you now slow down.
Guy: now give me a big hug.
She gave him a big hug.
Guy: can you take off my helmet & put it on yourself? it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road the guy realized that the breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tells him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so that she would live even if it meant that he would die.
Once a year, for reasons as of yet unknown, pear trees are attacked by partridges who will eat all the pears and smother the tree if not dealt with properly. The most successful strategy so far to tackle the partridge problem is as elegant as it is cumbersome. It involves releasing two turtle doves in the area the next day, followed by three chickens (French ones appear to be most effective). One must then produce four bird callings and offer five golden rings, which will lure six geese (some of which might be laying, but this is not a problem) and seven swans (possibly swimming) to the tree. If this fails to sufficiently scare off the partridges, help will be required from eight milkmaids, nine dancing ladies and ten leaping lords (though it has been reported that ten ordinary farmboys dressed up as lords will be equally effective). In the unlikely event that these actions still fail to chase off the partridges completely, eleven pipers and twelve drummers can be called in. Their ungodly cacaphony of noise will ensure the hasty departure of the remaining partridges. It is widely claimed that the pipers and drummers on their own would suffice, but one will find that for tradition's sake most pear farmers still stick to the full eleven-step protocol. Although some farmers have switched to shooting the feathery pests with a rifle, which also works.
I thank the donator(s)
Kate Smith = 2000 gold
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still gonna hunt him down
Team Aekea
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