Current wallpaper; "Vigilance" Artist; me.

Commission Status: Closed

Type: Wallpaper Artist

Current Commission: 1440x900
WIP Status: cloudscloudsclouds and dragons! <3
Estimated time to finish: Mid November or so.

Hi there. ^^ You can call me Whisper or Larele. I have many interests, including painting, cloud-watching, and collecting just about anything I can get my hands on, and fruit; my addiction. XD

I am eighteen in the eyes of the law, but I'm really just a little girl who lives on one side of a window, watching a world I do not understand play out on the other. As a little girl, I was alone, not knowing or caring of the world outside my own. I spent those years, sitting on my bedroom floor, and organizing my toys there. I didn't understand why it hurt so bad when someone clapped, why I felt so sick around air fresheners, or why it hurt to touch certain things.

I didn't know why I wouldn't play with the other children-but secretly longed to be invited, or why I'd rather organize things in the classroom, than take my turn reading outloud. For most of my life I was without any answers to my silent questions.

I didn't care for human friends, but I was quite happy with a praying mantis, baby frogs, cicadas, and a small dog. My first friend was a praying mantis, and I was about 4-6 years. :3

In 2006 I was diagnosed with epileptic seizures, but this only told me why numbness would creep into my body. Shortly after being diagnosed, something happened in school. I was told that day that I never came back from lunch, and someone had found me on the bathroom floor..I didn't know how I got there, or why. ..after a third attack, during a blackout in winter, I was withdrawn and placed into a virtual school. I'll never forget those feelings of being lost..voices fading..numbness creeping..it's a terrifying feeling to know you're losing control.

In 2007 I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome..and suddenly I understood..why. I understood why others around me didn't seem to notice the smells, lights, and sounds I did, and I understood why I would rather spend my time lining up my stuffed animals in a circle all around me, by size, color, and animal. I also learned why I didn't understand a person's facial or body language.

I live in the United States, with my parents, and my kids-geckos. I have one little sister, but she's elsewhere in the world right now. I love my family, but I wish I understood them more..and they me.

I've been here since January 10, 2006. I usually lurk in the picture post, and jigsaw is a favorite activity..I wish pinball was safe..but it is too flashy. Every once in a while, I like to cosplay a character from a game or show, but I rarely enter the avatar arena. I'm a lil shy about starting a conversation, but I'm working on it slowly. I'm also an -ex-role-player-but I hope to change that status in the the near future.

I can happily say I've become acquainted with some very special people, since joining this site. If gaiaonline hadn't of been created, I might've never found my soul mate, it's just that 1/1,000,000 or more chance. I am also glad to of met others on the autistic-spectrum, it really makes you feel..not alone.

I want to thank anyone who ever treated me as a real person-you know who you are of course, and those who saw no difference between us, and those who gave me memories of friendship I'll never forget. I learned alot over these past years from my nonautistic friends, about how they saw the world, and I realized just how much I've missed.

You see, the internet isn't about pixels, but about the people we find and those who find us, and give us those special feelings..of belonging..and the feelings we give back. Deep down, even the most-reclusive of people long for companionship, long for an outstretched hand and a smile..long for acceptance.

..don't just join for items or to say and do things just because you think it's the internet, be someone, do something you know is good. ..it's not just the internet, and your actions can affect the person on the other end of the screen, for better or for worse.

There's no greater feeling than knowing someone, whether many miles away or sitting next to you, is there because you gave them belief..you gave that person hope..or they gave it to you. ^__^

Friendship. Is. The greatest gift.