Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Okay, here are a few things that I've written about before that I should update anyone interested about:

1) Job. I am working now as a captioner. I don't make a lot of money, but the job is GREAT! (If you're interested, you can message me and I can share the info with you if it looks like it would be a good match.) I work from home, no anxiety about working with other people. I get paid every week on Monday directly into PayPal. I pick which jobs I want to do, when I work (literally can work any time of day any number of days), when I want to take vacation, just everything about it. And there are nice people there on forums that I have become friends with, in a wya.

2) Weight. Wow. This is a biggy. I've gone from 225 back in November of 2017 down to the 130s and hopefully into the 120s. I am 3 pounds away from having normal BMI. I eat healthy foods now and when I want to, I have some other foods, too. Just yesterday I had a candy bar. But it took me literally 24 hours to eat it and I only had the one. I ate it in addition to the healthy food I have. It didn't make me explode or anything -- because it was a one-time splurge. I allowed myself to enjoy it and today things were back to normal. Because I can choose to allow things, I am fine with this new lifestyle for the rest of my life. It's sustainable.

3) Exercise. Again, huge change. Last November I was lucky to get to the mailbox and back (but I live in an apartment complex so I had to walk quite a ways, actually). Now, I'm participating in virtual races over 100 miles long and I'm also taking part in my first ever real life 5K on the day after my birthday. This morning I went out and ONLY did 3.1 miles at a jog/walk pace. This evening, just for fun, I put in 3/4 of a mile while waiting for my ride. Tomorrow is my rest day, so I'm not a fanatic about it. Again, reasonableness makes this a sustainable way of life for me.

4) Relationships. Well, not so great in this arena, but not so bad, either. I can talk to my ex but I don't worry about him or fret if we don't talk. Two of my kids have moved away and don't seem to have time to even text me. But that's there loss. I'm keeping the lines of communication open and when they want to chat we will. Two of my kids still live with their dad and I try to get together with each of them once a month, every other month if necessary. (Just to let you know, these aren't little kids - my oldest is 31 and my youngest is 26.) I live with my son and we've got a strong relationship. We're both adults and we're roommates and friends.

So, I'm finally happy, or at the very least, content. I feel good. I look good (comparatively). I am able to pay my bills. I enjoy what I do with my time. I have a reason to get up every morning. I am just plain living the way I should have been for the last 25 years. And it all started when I had the courage to leave a bad situation and start creating a good one for myself.

Believe me, if I can do it, you can. If you want to talk, if you need to talk, message me. I'm not here as often as I was, but when I do come here, I'll reply as quickly as possible.