I know this is hard for me.
I cried loads.
I feel a sense of lost.
It feels like I just lost a friend.
A very dear friend to me.
Every time I try to talk about it with my mom,
I can already feel the tears welling up in the the corner of my eyes.
I couldn't continue talking cause I'm afraid I would burst into tears.
So I just responded with "uhm.." until she says "take care".
Then I put the phone down and cry.
Sometimes I wish I could forget about it all.
Because whenever I remember all the time we've spent together,
I couldn't help but cry.
I know this has to be done in order to gain His blessings and mercy.
But it's so hard..
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