I really love to rant, but that's because I just get so... Into it, it's cray-cray.
So this entry is about what type of friend I am. I have had my friendships questioned by the most shittiest of people, and it's hilarious. Mainly because they weren't people I considered my real friends but just those casual conversation people you have. Their not acquaintances, just a little bit more than that, but just your casual conversations and few good laugh peoples. I don't know what they are to me, there might be a word for it but I don't know. I don't give a flying toot toot.
I'm the type of friend that I will never go out of my way to blatantly disrespect you even when we aren't friends anymore. I will not say anything behind your back that I wouldn't say to your face. Usually what I tell someone, I will tell that other person so nobody can say that I was saying s**t about them and I look like a fool. No, and I only share things with people that I want them to know. If I feel that its an open topic and I do not give two flying poot poots if you tell that to someone else then that's what I share with you. I can count on one hand how many people I actually can trust with my feelings wholeheartedly or tell secrets too. And it's less than five.
I am a loyal friend. No, not the type where your enemy is my enemy, unless they did something horrendous to you than probably but I give all people a chance... But I will never choose to do something with someone you dislike where I know it might hurt your feelings or just appear wrong. I stand by you, I support you the most, and I don't like what your doing then yeah, I'm not going to support you on that because I don't encourage what you're doing. As a friend, I tell you that I don't like what you are doing or saying because I'm being honest with you. But I knew if the situation would hurt you or make you feel comfortable, I put your feelings first because if I care about you, I'm just going to go out my way for you. That's how I roll. Unless you ******** up before, I'm probably not but even then I might.
I'm only going to be bluntly honest if you ask me to be 'cause yeah, I don't want to intentionally hurt your feelings and even though the God honest truth is the best way, I still wouldn't put it in a way that hurts your feelings unless there's just no sugarcoating it. I have had a habit before of biting my tongue and that's only led me to building up anger and soon exploding. So biting my tongue is pretty much a no-no now unless its something really insignificant and I probably won't even remember in a few days.
Not to mention, I can quickly leave friendships faster than you can say piano. I can cut people out of my life like it's nothing because I do not fight for people anymore. I hate fighting for people, especially because there are times where I know that person wouldn't fight for me or I just think it's best if we're not in each others lives. There are probably a few amount of people that I would actually fight for, that I would put my pride aside and make them stay and that's the same amount of people I trust with my feelings wholeheartedly.
I've gotten to that point where I don't really care for having new friends, even though new friends are nice, or keeping people I don't think or probably don't want to be around anymore. Some friendships, I understand, are worth fighting for but I rather not fight. I put my boxing gloves up a long time ago.
Last but not least, I'm the type of person that doesn't judge you based on your qualities or anything that. I judge you by the way you treat me and that's what our friendship is going to be. You treat me good, I treat you good, and we're just all fine and dandy. You treat me like s**t, I still might treat you good, but once I'm fed up with it, I'mma treat you like s**t. I'm a little too nice for my own good and I'm starting to cut that out. And it's for the better and to protect myself.
But instead of giving you a whole essay, I'mma leave that here. This basically a forewarning because I have some of the greatest friends and they are my life and I have never gotten into arguments or situations where I know our friendship is over.
I can be forgiving but there is only so much a person can forgive or take.
Ja Ne ~
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