Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals


View User's Journal

Subscribe to this Journal
Key to my World
LDR Day #12-22
Well its definitely been a while since my last entry. Life has suddenly gotten so hectic and busy all of a sudden. A lot has actually happened in the last week and a half or however long I've been out of this. Finally can drive so I guess now I can check that off the list now. I have been bad with my eating habits though. Really bad. Though I didn't lose much weight anyways but I should really get back on that. The boyfriend and I have been having our ups and downs but mostly we have figured out things to do together. Except it feels like its slowing down and I don't know what to do.

Yesterday I upset him somehow and even if I ask he won't tell me why. Says something about having to think about life. I just want to know what I did wrong. I feel like I hurt him in some way. I didn't mean to and I wish, I really, really wish I knew. The voices in my head are talking to me again. The ones that only come when I have anxiety. I wish we could be together so he can make them all go away. He always knows how to comfort me in these kinds of times. I feel like he is pushing me away and I wanna grab ahold of him but I don't think I'm able to if I made him feel that way.

Work has been killing me as well. So many hours and not even any time for myself nowadays. I feel like I'm drowning and I can't breathe. At times like these I really wish I had a cat cause at least I'd have someone with me. I'm wishing for some sort of breather from all this. I wish I knew all the answers to my problems. I wish there could be a way that I could just fix it all, but thats all wishful thinking. What do I do? Why does adulting have to be so hard. At least one trouble has been washed away today. Not like it really bothered me as much as other things anyways.

I really need to adjust back to eating good again. I need to firmly tell myself no you can't have this or you need to do this. It just seems like we were meant to just work and die after a certain point in life. Enjoy the kiddie years cause after that it's all downhill. There is no going back. Take whatever may come. Face all the hardships straight on. I wish that I had my rock of support next to me. Its all just to real right now.

Lunar Starlight
Community Member
Lunar Starlight
Prev | Next»
Archive | Home

  • [10/14/16 08:41pm]
  • [10/04/16 03:08am]
  • [10/02/16 09:04pm]
  • [10/01/16 07:27pm]
  • [10/01/16 12:10am]
  • [09/29/16 07:15pm]
  • [09/28/16 06:52pm]
  • [09/26/16 05:43pm]
  • [09/25/16 06:21pm]
  • [07/20/14 05:50pm]

    Manage Your Items
    Other Stuff
    Get GCash
    Get Items
    More Items
    Where Everyone Hangs Out
    Other Community Areas
    Virtual Spaces
    Fun Stuff
    Gaia's Games

    Customize your own avatar now!

    Join Now

    Have an account? Login Now!