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Literal s**t
Gonna write s**t here occasionally.
Why not update this? I find these terribly, irrevocably, and embarrassingly hilarious to look back on. I'm like 101% sure I'm the only one that will ever read them, so it's like a stupid time capsule of my life and writing style to my self.

As of Senior year of college, November 18th 2015, I'm now working an Office job where I get to sit and research how much it would cost to have Chipotle cater a dinner for 25 ($300 smackaroos), and then read shitty books on my phone to fill the time.

I'm also working as Front desk at a swim school, and so far that seems pretty fun, though I've yet to completely pick up all the details-- but we're getting there.

I was accepted into the Art Department's Paris program, and literally two days after, Paris was attacked in terror attacks. While my family is uneasy now about the trip, I do believe that we will be even safer now with increased security (and as terrible as it sounds, plane tickets will probably decrease in price, so that's good for us).

My credit it apparently good enough now to get lots of card offers, so I've accepted two in hopes that I'll be able to use them to pay for my paris trip. We'll see if that decision comes back to bite me in the a** in a few years, but hey... yolo.

I don't know if it's too recent for me to have written about, but I have a dog. A beautiful black lab named Lucy. She's currently just over a year and a half. She's my baby and I love her, even if she can be a little stinker sometimes. She keeps me company when I'm alone, and sad. It's really nice knowing that someone can love you as much as a dog does-- always excited to see you, and ready to give you lots of kisses when you cry.

On that note, I've also gotten over some minor depression issues recently. I was in a slump for awhile, after my best friend got a boy friend. I love her to death, and we used to be connected at the hip. We had a lot of plans for the future, but things changed when she started dating. Don't get me wrong, it's a great relationship for her, they're perfect for each other, and they really do love each other too... It's just... when they started going out, she attempted to still hang out with me, but it was obvious that she'd rather be talking to him. That, and how much she works and goes to classes... well, she really just didn't have the time for me anymore. And I get that school, work, and romantic relationships might become more important than keeping up with platonic relationships... But I guess I didn't realize how dependent I had been on her friendship to keep me company. That friendship was probably the closest thing I had to a 'soulmate' as of yet-- even if only friends. So to lose that, well... I was pretty bitter for a time. I still love her to death, but it's hard to earn her attention when she has so many other things more important than me pulling her away. And I can't really help that. So I've learned to live alone for the most part now. Sure I'll hang out with friends at school from time to time, but none of them are my 'best friend' really. Some are close, but not to the extent me and Rhema had been.

And I don't know why... if it's my appearance, my personality, or what... but no one ever seems interested in me. I really just wish sometimes that I didn't always have to be alone. But I'm used to it now.

My latest plan for the future has changed from moving to California with Rhema, to moving to Washington state alone. I have to get out of Michigan, these winters are killing my soul (overdramatic, but true). Washington seems like a great state for me-- mild climate, rainy, forests and mountains, higher minimum wage... west coast... It sounds perfect to me. Even if it is alone. I'm finding ways to be happy again. Moving out of Michigan will help that for sure.

Alright... this got more serious than I was expecting... but it feels good to write about it. I'm sure I'll look back on this in a year or so and wonder what the hell I was thinking... but again... yolo.

peace out.

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