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Collection of pure Jabberwocky.
What's 'Jabberwocky' you say? I'm not telling you. Ha. Okay, okay, it means a collection of words that make no sense. Which is a precise description of this thing. Good luck reading it.
Hot Spring Horror!: A semi-crack NarutoxHinata tale.
...And now even in the original format in which I posted it! (I originally posted it in the "funny naruxhina skits" thread in the "Simply Love 2" guild.) Enjoy!

*If I update this, I'll be sure to post it. Tell meh what you think. [/attention whore]






Sanee Wrote:
Hot Spring Horror! : A NarutoxHinata semi-crack fanfic.

A/N's
'....' = thoughts

Note: This gets pretty vulgar. Cursing and explicit references. Handle with care.


Naruto (or rather, "Naruko", his Oiroke no jutsu form) enters the girls' side of the hot spring

Naruto : (thinking to himself) 'Hee hee, I wonder which attractive girl I'll see today. This has to be one of my best ideas yet!'

Sakura and Ino walk in, gossiping about Sasuke or other BS, oblivious to "Naruto's ogling eyes.

Sakura: ...So that's the deal then? We share Sasuke?
Ino: Okay! I call him on any days that end in "y"! icon_heart.gif
Sakura: Hey! No fair Ino pig! icon_scream.gif
Naruto: (Thinking to "herself" )'Ooh~! Catfight, nyaa~' (Does his signature grin as a slight pink tinge spreads across "her" cheeks.)

Sakura and Ino both notice the "gifted" female nin sitting across the way

Ino: (whispering to Sakura) Hmm...I've never seen her before. Should we talk to her?

Sakura: (Thinking) 'Hnn... She looks oddly familiar. Isn't that Naruto-dobe's perverted jutsu? No way, even he wouldn't be that stupid to sneak in here.' (Replies to Ino) Yeah, I think we can trust her.

Ino: (Yelling out) Oi! You over there! What's your name?

Naruto: (Tries frantically to hide any distress) Uh uh uh.... Naruko!

Ino: That's quite a name, there. Y'know, I've never seen you here before.Where ya from?

Naruko: Uhh, I'm ...uh...visiting my cousin! 'Yeah, that's it!' You happen to know Uzumaki Naruto? Yeah, (starts to BS) he's pretty handsome, ne? I'd totally get with him if he weren't my cousin! icon_mrgreen.gif

Sakura: icon_stressed.gif icon_stressed.gif icon_stressed.gif
Heh. Lets just say we...don't get along very well.

Naruko: 'Oh geez. Now she's gonna start spewing s**t about me from her fat vampire mouth!'

Sakura: (Tries to stop thinking about him.)

Ino: So, new girl, do you like to play matchmaker? It's really fun!

Naruko: Err. I don't really get into that sort of thing. Plus, I don't really know anyone here....

Ino: That's a shame! Say Sakura, who's your favortie pair right now?

Sakura: Well, to be honest, I'm not actaully trying to make a crack pairing like I usually do. I am currently obsessed with the idea of getting the world's most perfect couple, Naruto and Hinata, together! I won't settle for failure!

Naruko: icon_eek.gif 'I've never heard of that idea before. D:
I mean, I really wouldn't mind it...Heh heh...but she seems more scared of me than anything.'

Ino: I know! I wonder if Naruto even notices why Hinata is so shy around him? Everyone in Konoha knows that she has a major crush on him! (Lowers voice)...But I really do not see what she sees in him. Does she have a thing for stupidity?

Naruko: 'Wow. I...never even knew. I wish I could say something. '
(His deep breathing becomes audible, and a definite blush appears on "her" face.)

Both girls are oblivious to Naruto's condition from the heated discussion.

Sakura: You've gotten the major crush part right. I read her diary once and...wow. I don't think I saw a page that wasn't about Naruto. Man, so many pages of how she hoped that he'd notice her, how she's been trying to say something to him....

Ino: Man, that makes me support them even more! Hinata really deserves to be happy, even if her happiness is in the form of that dumbass.

Sakura: Wait! Lemme finish! She got really crazy about him too! Really fangirlish s**t! Like, she put the names of their kids, she filled at least 5 pages with "Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata...", and let's not forget about those erotic scenarios of what she wanted Naruto to do to her on some hot, steamy nights....
It honestly scared the ******** out of me. emo.gif

Ino: .............

Naruko: 'EROTIC? Oh man, I'm in some deep s**t. I have to get out of here before I "react" to that...Uh oh. Too late.
(He gets a massive nosebleed, which careens him to the bottom of the hotspring with a resounding "CRASH!")

All the water splashes out of the tub, and Ino and Sakura both develop prize-winning "WTF?" expressions as they gave onto the almost naked form a Naruto, sporting a huge erection , with his mouth ajar and his left eye twitching frantically.

Both: NA-RU-TO!!!!!!!

Sakura: I will KILL YOU!

Naruto: s**t! Best idea ever my a**! I'm so humilated!

Ino: You'll be more than humiliated when we get done with you! icon_scream.gif
Gladiator!

Naruto proceeds to run out of the wrecked onsen, with Ino and Sakura in tow. Think of Benny Hill chase scenes.


'Hokay. That's enough for now. I'll probably update this, but I'd really like to see what you guys think. (Plus, my hands are tired, and I need to think of a happy ending, possibly. I 'uuno. I don't know if I want Naruto to go through more hell. Though, I'll feel bad, since he's my man-sexy.
-Poses-
Hinata: Die! icon_scream.gif
Me : Eheh, sorry. icon_sweatdrop.gif)

(Oh yeah, this is way more that just a "skit" Sorry.)







User Comments: [3] [add]
Delirious Entertainment
commentCommented on: Sat May 19, 2007 @ 03:18am
That is awsome.
You should continue, and put it on fanfiction.
But with other Characters.
Or not.
:DDDDD


commentCommented on: Thu Jun 28, 2007 @ 02:55am
icon_eek.gif uh... WTF!?
that daiary bit is over the top, it kinda is against her character, mabe get rid of it,
and dosn't Naruto dispise ero-saninn for being a "pervy old saninn"??
it's a little non-belivable



little-ninja-rabbit
AmerikaForAnarchy
commentCommented on: Fri Feb 15, 2008 @ 06:15am
Hawt.


User Comments: [3] [add]
 
 

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