My grandmother has been sick for about 10 years now and it seems like shes in the final stretch. She can barely breathe now and is maybe 60lbs. She can't talk or eat and she is pumped up on drugs and my mom feeds her through a tube in her stomach. She wears a diaper and everything.
Well, now she seems like it about time she dies. She fading away and you can see it.
I'm sad but, I'm also blank about it. Shes been this way about 90% of the time I've known her. Shes lived with us since forever, shes been sick the whole time. I guess when I was younger maybe around 5 or 6 I knew her a little bit, but other than that, she's just been the sick old lady that lives with us.
I can tell my mom is really sad and depressed over the whole thing, I can understand that, I mean, how wouldI feel if I've been taking care of her for 10 years and then shes about to die? So yeah, I would probably feel the same.
I don't even know why I'm writing this. Maybe I'm just bored and that seems to be the topic of the day. A lot of family and people came over and prayed over grandma.
It's just a really sad time I guess and I feel a bit sad over the fact that I don't feel as sad as I think I should.
Whatever. ; ;
EDIT: Well, she died. This morning on the 17th. And now all of the sudden I've been tearing up on and off. ><
Random. Pictures. Thoughts. Updates.