|
::Stranger in a Strange Land::
I'm doing this book report so I can get a free Harry and the Potters toothbrush when the band comes to Texas. I'm going to be illustrating this- but I'd love some feedback.
::Stranger in a Strange Land::
I decided to read Stranger in a Strange Land, because I used to really love old X-men comic books, and there's one issue of "What If" in which Kurt Wagner (Nightcrawler) grew up differently, and was named "Michael" after Michael Valentine Smith- the main character in this Heinlein sci-fi novel. The phrase "Stranger in a Strange Land" is a quote from the Bible ((drawing of Moses here)), and has also been used to describe other characters of importance, like Mr. Spock from Star Trek (more on that later). Both Nightcrawler and Spock have pointy ears, and although I don't believe the phrase has been used to describe any of J. K. Rowling's characters- I think Dobby meets the requirements. ((Diagram of Dobby with 1. Pointy ears and 2. Kind of an oddball))
In this novel, a lot of people flew to Mars. They must have done something wrong because nobody hears from them for like 25 years. Probably they were waiting for peak hours to go down so they could use their space phones to call for help. I guess they didn't know nights and weekends were free.
When the people of earth did manage to retrieve their lost space faring brethren, they were all dead. That is, of course for Mr. Michael Valentine Smith. I think it's really good than Heinlein decided to keep this character alive, because if he hadn't it would have been a really short book and probably not very interesting. Unfortunately for Mr. Smith, Earth is full of politics and lawyers- and basically he is ridiculously wealthy, and maybe even owns Mars. This is a pretty rough for Michael, because he hasn't even adjusted to Earth gravity or atmosphere yet, and has to spend a while being guarded at a hospital. Bummer of a vacation so far.
Lucky for Michael- a plucky reporter tries to act with his best interests in mind, and gets his old girlfriend Jill, to smuggle Michael out of the hospital. When the going gets rough Michael turns the superpowers on and makes the police disappear. Jill is shocked- but it's just one of many Martian psychic powers that Michael is capable of using. Looks like he can handle himself just fine.
There's a lot of your standard Earth-Girl-Meets-Alien-Dude stuff here, and the two are equally mystified by each other. See, even though Michael is biologically human, he was raised on Mars, so he has a Martian way of thinking and understanding things. He doesn't even want to walk on the grass until he 'groks' it.
((sidenote panel)) The word grok is something Heinlein madeup, and probably good to know if you like playing boggle or doing crosswords. It literally means 'to drink'- which has a lot to do with Martians and their lack of water, but a better translation would be 'To understand fully'. When Michael groks the grass- he understand it, and perceives its point of view. He realizes the grass is totally okay with him walking on it, an even wants him to. Back in the 1960's, nerdy kids would go around wearing pins that said things like "I Grok Spock", because it was like having two geeky sci-fi references for the price of one!
This gets boring after a while, so Heinlein mixes it up with some new characters. Lots of them! Jill takes Michael to this guy named Jubal, which if you ask me is way more of a Martian name than Michael. I think that's what one would call "irony" if one was a writer and liked to identify literary devices in one's spare time.
Jubal wastes no time in getting the people of Earth to realize it would be pretty dumb to claim that Michael OWNED Mars since A. Martians were living there before humans came for a vist and B. Michael had yet to beat Mars's high score on Halo 2.
Things calm down for Michael a bit, since he no longer has to worry about owning a planet- and is still ridiculously wealthy. He decides to celebrate with a bit of exploratory research using Jubal's hot secretaries as assistants. Really, I think this was just an excuse to make out with hot supermodels, but I'm sure it's symbolic for lots of things about, um... emotions. And stuff. Michael is apparently the best at making out ever, because his brain isn't cluttered up with things like normal people. It's pretty much exactly the opposite of that one episode of Star Trek : The Next Generation where Data tries to date this girl named Jenna D'Sora and when he's kissing her he's recalibrating 6 things and picking out catfood.
One thing that compltely mystifies Michael is religion. Jubal and Jill figure there's no harm in helping him learn more about it, so they introduce him to the leader of the "Fosterites"- which is this huge crazy religion that employes celebrities to help spread the word. I don't know that any of them jump on sofas, but they do gamble because it helps get more people interested in joining. Digby, the Supreme Bishop of the Fosterites wants Michael to be a spokesperson for them as well, but Michael prefers to make him disappear.
The book pretty much breaks in half neatly on this line, so if you're hungry, you might want to use the time to get something to munch on. Don't worry- Michael and all his friends (except Digby) will still be here when you get back.
Jill and Michael set off on a series of misadventures which don't involve much in the way of dragons, elves, or robots- but do involve a lot of psychic powers and people starting religions. They have a quick stint in the carnival business, but Michael is pretty lame as a performer, so he's totally fired. He probably didn't even make enough to pay for his uniform. Double bummer, man.
Jill begins to learn some of Michael's psychic powers- and Michael figures he pretty much has a handle on this whole "humanity thing". He decides that the decent thing to do would be to help human realize how petty and foolish they are- and the best way to do that would be to start his own church. He calls his church the "Church of All Worlds". Using the same techniques as the Fosterites to help rope in followers- Michael helps the church to grow- and pretty soon, they're bigger than... the Beatles.
The core followers of the Church all live in this commune and prett y much never wear clothes and practice developing their psychic powers by getting it on with each other around the clock in an effort to rid themselves of petty human jealosy. It's kinda like it's the official church of scary hippies, except with more money. People outside the church apparently don't like scary hippies, and begin to persecute Michael.
Jubal worries about Michael- he doesn't want to see him get hurt, but like a Dad on an early 90's prime time sitcom, encourages Michael to go on with his beliefs. I guess it sounded like good advice at the time, but I'm not sure Jubal realized that Michael would interpret "hold to your beliefs" as "Give yourself up and let the protesters kill you". That's what happens anyway- but it's supposed to be symbolic and awesome and meaningful.
In the end, Jubal and the others decide to continue Michael's work. They want to 'grok' him, and accomplish this by eating his remains, which is apparently something that gets done on Mars all the time. I guess it worked for them, but I really hope that when Leonard Nimoy dies, all the trekkies eat at home.
|
