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...Maybe time will tell you
Why I got so much hell to sell you
Please, please understand me
Oh you can't just dance around me
Maybe your work will love you
When I'm just not there to hold you
Maybe your pride can be your companion
Oh but I just won't be there to stand for it
Not one more minute will I stand for it...


Things seem to compound in the most interesting of ways.
I won't whine and accuse the world of stacking things against me but it certainly does feel like a number of obstacles are beginning to pile up.
A family pet has taken to being very ill. In fact, she has been ill since the previous entry... I still have reservations on putting things here for whatever reason. I guess I don't want to be seen as someone who whines endlessly over things out of their power... Though the venting would be part of the purpose of this journal so... Maybe it's not as big a quandary as I originally thought.
Regardless, she has been at the veterinary hospital for the past few days as tests and treatments were run due to her pancreatic problems - An event I can truly sympathize with lately.
For now she is home and in my room she lays, next to me where she typically does. It's as if things returned to normal for the moment but even now I know and understand that it is far from being over.
I have a horrendous feeling that her life is drawing to an end. The familiar empty feeling of loss permeates the house. I think that this is simply a defense mechanism I've subconsciously employed to help deal with the situation. After all if you're already familiar with something it cannot affect you as much, right? If I've accepted a situation, I have no right to be sad, yes?
I, personally, am not ready to let her just pass right along, she has been in my life for eight years and I have been doing all within my power to stretch that out so long as no suffering comes to her. But even I know when to pack it up and call it quits, it's been almost a week and I've exhausted all of my options that are within reason.
I just hope it was enough.

Moving on,
I've noticed that my personal symptoms haven't moved whatsoever.
So while I'm not getting better... At least I'm not getting worse.
The days have been moving in a bit of a frightening blur, though. Days are spent working on one thing or another, the nights spent reading, drinking, playing, or the mix of the three.
I've been spending a bit of time with a friend of mine and his band. A good lot; fun to hang around... And there's a lot of musical overlap between us so the conversation can be fairly interesting as well as the events. As a result, I've been picking up my guitar more often much to the dismay of immediate. Maybe in time I'll work up the courage to see if I could actually play with them. I've been told I have a decent vocal range and sound... But who hasn't, right? And I can play SOMEWHAT
I am happy to have found another way to occupy my time, seeing as my endeavors in Boxing have taken a backseat to my personal health... Much to MY dismay.
Just as well, my habits wouldn't lend to being progressive there, for now.
And the weather's gotten... Eugh.

Let's just say I've tried some pretty stiff drinks in the past few days and it's not been able to take the chill off.
Gonna be a cold Winter, best bundle up.