People say i deserve better, and that in should just end it because we fight so much. over the stupidest things too. even mom said we fight to much and if we keep fighting this much it won't last. Momma is right tho. People point out how much i have changed for him, and friends come and ask why i don't talk to them anymore and i'll lie and say i'm just too busy when in actuality my boyfriend just doesn't like me talking to guys, which is understandable. but yet i hate when people point out that i don't stand up to him and i let him talk down to me and scold me like a child, i don't argue back, i just sit there. That i let him tell me what to do and walk all over me basically. My friends don't like him because he's made me cry so much and because he stops me from doing anything like i can't go to my friends 15 because he has to work. but that's understandable since i f*cked up the last time he let me go out without him. But shes mad because i was suppossed to go on the limo with her and be there for pictures and all, but oh well, its okay. i just hope i can go to my friend Desiree's 15 cause i told her i'd be there. well of course, i told my other friend i'd be at hers too but then my boyfriend told me no so i just shut up and not argued since i didnt want to get dumped again. He's a pain in the a** to be honest. He won't change for me, but i changed for him. people tell me to either correct this or leave him because it's not right. i guess they are right but i cant bring myself to tell him to change anything about himself even if i dont like it because how he is, is who i fell in love with. Hes my pain in the a**. All i want is for him to love me for me, and not tell me that he loves me just not some things i do or how i dress or act. I love this boy, and i dont want to let him go. He promised to be mine forever:heart
but of course that promise was broken when he left me. but oh well. he promised again so its okay.
Just as long as i dont do something he doesnt like
Why do i love him so much? He's stolen my little broken piece of s**t of a heart, fixed it, shined it, filled it with love, broken it, fixed it, broken it, fixed it again and just over and over. but i just cant stop loving him. hes like a drug and i'm addicted. I love his warm hugs, and his kisses, and when he stares into my eyes and tells me he loves me. Everyday my love for him grows more, and i fear for the day that comes that he breaks my heart again because i dont know how much more it can take.
but i love him. i really really really do.
Not-so-basic · Fri Oct 03, 2014 @ 01:11am · 0 Comments |