Lately, I've had this urge to write down, in this case: type, all my feelings. What I'm doing, thinking, saying, or feeling. I just feel the absolute need to put it somewhere. It's odd, but it makes sense. I've had this thing where if I'm daydreaming, it's always different scenarios of us as a couple. I'm never shy talking about him anymore and I've given up with worrying if people think we're a thing. I have this small inkling of hope that makes me feel as though everyone's "thing" for us could be finalized, initiated, and even an actual "thing." It made me realize that I've had no feelings of this before - even with all of my past crushes. It's quite new to me. I've never liked someone I've been so close to before. I feel like a day without him is impossible for me to endure; impossible for me to think, breathe, talk, and even eat - and that's saying something! He's always on mind and I've written and blogged about him numerous times and though I hate being "that girl," I can't help but being "that girl." I need to make our nothing into something. I need it to be real. I'm done with being left out of the relationship-mobile; being a part of the singles club was good, but can only sustain my satisfaction for so long and I think 17 years it far too long. I'm ready and this needs to happen.
· Mon May 12, 2014 @ 01:39am · 0 Comments