While life seems to be good madness grips me more day by day.
Most days i'm fine. pleased with where I am and where i'm going.
Sometimes I'm watching a dream thats too real, yet anything is possible, and there are no consequences.
Sometimes I'm empty and numb. Catatonic. Lifeless.
Sometimes I'm gone; wasted on the improper mish-mash of chemicals in my brain.
Emotions fighting for dominance, tumbling and turning at horrible velocities.
"I" that is "myself", gets pushed so far down then. Terrified at the storm that possess me, and sends me into manic lunacy. I can only watch in horror as my body losses its self to chemistry. My soul no longer in control.
Other times i'm far too happy. Or so angry I resist urges of horrible violence. Or so sad that I fight tears back for no reason.
I am on some distant foggy shore looking out to the main land. Currents carry pieces of reality and break in waves upon my shore. I am left with the shattered remains.