Journal entry 2; 2/7/14 6:33 P.M.
It's been a while since I've made a journal entry, a month exactly, off by around 3 hours I think. None-the-less, here I am. You know, after my first entry, things actually looked up a bit. I made a new connection with an old friend, and I lifted myself up passed the bad things that were going on in my life. But, as life has always tended to do to me, it ended, and here I am. In this hole and pit of sorrow once more. I saw a very close "friend" of mine with a guy today, who she'd promised me she was leaving (because he treats her like complete and utter garbage). And, well, I was developing feelings. I saw them together today, kissing, and it crushed my heart once more.
I know that I should really learn to not get my hopes up. But for ******** sake I just want to be loved. Is it really that difficult? I didn't want to think it was, but I'm learning it is..
I've contemplated.. Self harm. Again.
But I know it's not the right thing to do. I need to push through this.
But, how can I? I'm worthless right?
I don't know. I'm trying to look past my dark days and look forward and hope and pray to god that things start looking brighter. If not, I don't know what I'll do.
I guess all i can do... Is hope...
The life of Perest.
This Journal will pretty much be a place for my thoughts, and writings accordingly. I don't expect feedback of any sort. I'm doing this for the sake of my sanity. And, well, because it's not like I really have anyone to b***h to about my problems any