Hey everybody =P
It's been a long time since I've written any journal entries, since I realized that no one really reads these entries, and the people that do, by chance, view them, don't care about them. Even so, it is a journal! =D
I decided to write this one so I won't forget what I saw tonight. Tonight, I opened my window (which was almost frozen shut...) and I looked outside, and I saw a clear night sky. No moon, but the stars were out. The trees are black, and standing tall. Really, really tall, like in the sky... they're some really tall trees. I am currently trying to open my window, because it's surprisingly frozen shut. And, now, it's open. The thing that I really wanted to remember about tonight is the wind... it's so, so powerful. The wind chimes are going crazy, and the trees are bending. I can hear the whole house settle, cause the wind is so powerful. It's freezing out there, but then, it's January. I want to write a song or a short story type thing about tonight, and the trees, and the wind, and the stars, but I'm so sleepy and it's so late... and I'm so confused about what it is that I want to do with my passion anyway. Still, I have this entry, at least.
The reason I stopped writing entries for the most part is because of this... I loved writing entries and giving them special titles, because it was almost like releasing songs or books to a crowd. Some of my (the wind just picked up like crazy! Wooooshhhh!! =D ) journal entries have really special names. I would write them and then release them, and people would read them. Sometimes dozens of people, some of my entries have fifty and sixty and seventy and even a hundred views. It was like I was releasing titles to a crowd... like I dream of doing. But, then, I realized that I don't have a crowd. At least, not one that's really interested... and these journal entries aren't works of art, anyway. They're just journal entries =P
So, I'm moving on to better things. Or, trying. Even so, it's 5:17 am, and I can't sleep at all. It's a dark morning... and it's the third day of the new year. The wind is absolutely freezing, my curtain is blowing in my face. It's freezing outside, too... the trees are black, and bending in the wind... and my window is now frozen open. And I cannot close it. I'm bruising my fingers trying too... and now it's closed. I'm never opening it again. Ever =.=
But still. Creating titles that I love and turning them into journal entries is not what I should be doing with this inspiration... =P
This isn't the crowd I am dreaming of, and these journal entries are not what I should be doing with the inspirations I get. Tonight is a night to remember. I started my new Pokemon X file on New Years Day, and I just played Final Fantasy VII, and I finished Cloud's flashback, where Sephiroth burned down Nibelheim. I'm also in the middle of Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Gates to Infinity. The Inflora Forest music inspires me so much to write music of my own, and I really, really want to be a musician... but I don't even know where to start.
It's almost 5:30 am on the third day of twenty fourteen. The wind is blowing like crazy, I can hear it through the windows and walls. I can hear the wind chimes, too. I'm thinking of Final Fantasy VII, and Cloud's story... and I'm looking out the window, and seeing the black sky with little stars creating no light to speak of. I'm seeing the tall, tall black trees bending in the wind, and I'm listening to the wind roar , even though I'm within the walls of the house. I can't stop thinking... about the girl with the blue hair. Who is she? She's someone. She's been here as long as my new name has. I'll have to find her along with so many other things that are blurry right now. Someone wish me luck. Anyone... and mean it.
I don't think anyone is left. I don't know if any of you care about my journal entries, or read it. I'm not active around Gaia anymore, and I have no Gaia friends, really... one or two, maybe three or four. It's my fault. I remember playing TinierMe and hearing people say "TinierMe is so boring, I have no friends..." and I always thought "Yeah, it's your fault."
Well, maybe I'm no better than them, now... and maybe this will be one of the last entries I post, I'm not sure. But, this isn't goodbye! If Any of you are worth keeping, I wish you would let me know, so I could make sure to never lose touch with you. But, now I'm rambling... I think I should try to sleep. Or, maybe just lay in bed, thinking of the story... the story of Cloud... and... the girl with blue hair.