Rigid collodion works. I rigid collodioned a friend on his hairy arm and it works as hair-removal wax. I collodioned all my friends after the recital. It's actually for making really badass scars.
I found an old website I made when I was fifteen. I was a very animated writer, but very idealistic. I wrote stories that I tried to pass off as reality, but anyone older than fifteen could tell they weren't real. Because people don't get so excited and talk about dreams. Mostly we talk about what we plan on doing next week. I tried very hard to sound cool. So much slang.
I turn twenty next year.
I think the lady who cut my hair has tired eyes. I dyed my hair blue and it's washed off leaving yellow streaks and she missed all the yellow strands. I have two long strands of yellow hair.
My friend is asleep on the couch with her laptop on her stomach, her head thrown back, and her mouth open.
I'm jealous of whoever my roommate is talking to on the phone. I can't make him laugh like that.
Like I said, he's a really strange guy. All my friends are unconventional, which means they aren't boring. He says strange things. Before the recital, he tells my friend, "You are glamorous. You are beautiful. You look just like Marilyn Monroe." [Hyperbole, hyperbole, hyperbole. But without get-in-your-pants guile.] When she doesn't really look like Marilyn Monroe. I could never tell her that because that would be a lie. I can't lie unless I believe the lie.
He says to me, "You look like you could be a really good good-looking guy or girl. You're androgynous. Now no one can judge you by your gender."
I think he was remembering something I said to him a while ago about hating to be judged.
And then today, when someone thought I said, "I hate men," when I actually said, "I hate walruses" or something, they said, "So what are you?" and he said, "He's transgender."
It took me a second to process that as a joke.
I'm rude to him sometimes because he's so oblivious about the way his actions are not appropriate to the situation. But he talks more easily to people he doesn't know than I do, so I can't say he's socially stupid. I can rely on him to never notice anything.
I shush him when my friend is sleeping, and it took me two shushes for him to say, in quick succession, "Are you shushing me?" and "Is it because she's sleeping?" and "You can just say, 'talk quietly because she's sleeping.'" and "Did you not say that because you thought it was obvious?"
People are complex. I can't say he's slow, and I like him a lot, but he's weird. They're all insane. Do you ever feel like you're surrounded by crazy people?
But then, I also am not the one forming warm. laugh-hard-over-the-phone connections with people. Because I am grouchy and critical and cautious.