Just some scattered thoughts from today. I won't press myself to make any exceedingly long entries. For now I'll just try and keep things simple.

This week is exams week, I'm so close to the end. I worked so amazingly hard this semester and I hope the results show. If they don't..ah well I suppose because what really matters is how much I learned. This semester has truly been life changing for me in terms of my education. I reaally have fallen in love with science (at least animal related science) and I'm so thankful I made the decision to remain in school and add another major. I feel like I'm no longer as ignorant of the world, and this new-found knowledge has even helped me discover what I want out of my art background.

On that note all I have left this week is two written exams (Zoology/Geology), a resume cover letter for my env. seminar class, an essay question for evolution, and two homework assignments and a presentation for extinction.

Btw, Zoology and Extinction are hands down the greatest classes I've ever taken! So interesting. Much fun. Very animal. Wow, heart

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On a more disdainful note Christmas is rapidly approaching. I absolutely love Christmas because it's the one time of year I can spoil the people I cherish. I love trying my best to search for those perfect gifts that best suites the person question. However, I say disdainful because this year is different. I've been having a lot of financial trouble due to school. I can no longer have a job while in school with this new major. Mainly because a lot of the cognate classes I need( math, chem, ect) I've either never touched or haven't seen at all. My study time is like three times greater than that of others. Although, after my second semester in ecology I'm starting to feel a lot more confident in myself with what I know. But switching from liberal arts to science has been quite a challenge for me. But a rewarding one.

Anyway, my main point is that I'm poor. Dirt poor. Like I can't even take care of myself; I can't get myself new glasses or contacts (which are amazingly old and I don't have eye insurance ), I can't buy myself clothes or boots for the winter, I can't even afford to buy myself food or gas. All my financial aid went to my rent. So I've really been struggling like mad this semester. Money can be a really stressful matter and it's weighed really heavily on me as of late. My wonderful fiance has assisted me so much this year, I wouldn't be able to eat with out him. However I hate being dependent on other people...

So yeah..I have $13 in my bank account. I can't afford to buy anyone a Christmas gift, and it's just really depressing. I had banked on using some birthday money my dad sent me for gifts, however the check was lost in the mail and he ended up cancelling it. I was so upset, I had the perfect things picked out for Gregory (boyfriend). I know Christmas isn't about gifts or anything, but I still wanted to show him my appreciation, gratitude, and love... I know I can still do that, but it's just not the same really.

I'm going to try to rack my brains out to see if I can cheaply craft something for him. I have some sewing stuff, wood burning materials, and some paints. Hopefully I can come up with something before I see him again in a week.

Anyway, I don't really have anything else today to share. I suppose I need to get my butt working on finals stuff. Thanks for listening. And good luck to anyone else who has finals this week! I wish you well.

heart
Saki-da

(note: I don't actually know what saki-da means. It was something I apparently made up and used when I was 14. I saw it on my old blog site..I thought it was cute, so I'm using it now : P )