I might not be able to enlist.
******** therapy lead to a psych evaluation, and I'm not sure I passed.
Unfit for the ******** state.
If I'm lucky I might be able to make it into the regular army.
Not that I ******** want to.
If I can't be the best what's the point.
Drag everyone down with me.
Because moods are contagious.
Even fake ones.
All somewhat jokes aside this was a severe hit upon my morale.
If I could retreat from battle, or if someone would convince me to defect.
I just got back home.
I was with Jessie for like three days.
At least I think it was three days it was kind of a blur.
I slept a few times which was nice.
It was just me seeing the future though each time.
It wasn't like far into it, just what we would do when we got up.
It gave me massive ******** headaches.
My dog seems to be the only one overjoyed to see me these days.
He cries, jumps, runs, and barks just from me walking through the door.
Granted it's pretty hard for someone to top that.
I guess the point I was going to make was another attempt at planning failed.
Either I suck at planning my future or I'm just not allowed to.
It ******** up somehow each time.
I'm not too mad about it.
I've gotten pretty good at bottling I guess.
It helps to come home to an empty house.
Now I can just be naked and play music.
Not that I couldn't before, it just feels better when I'm alone.
Moping, sighing, making weird noises, and some goat sacrifices;
You know the usual.
I'm really tired still.
I'm also smelling something I know cannot be true.
It's ******** up when your mind's playin' tricks on ya! lol...
That was a song reference, but I was being serious..
I think I'm going to cut my hair, and shave.
Maybe go on Tumblr a bit, and feel like someone likes my blog.
I need attention, cause I'm a whiny b***h.
I don't normally feel this way.
Well maybe I do?
I don't normally admit it that's for sure.
The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.
The complex puzzles inside of my head are hard to decipher.
I'm not good at it either.
Maybe that's why I feel so much better when I'm under the influence of something.
Preferably alcohol, but love, drugs, books, and for sure music helps.
My eyes are burning much like they used to, but it's not like I didn't sleep.
Will I ever learn to understand mah bodz?
Bro do I even lift?
I don't know..
What did I say I was going to do.
I'm way to tired to scroll up and read that s**t.
I've made 300 spelling mistakes.
Never stop counting.
Or do I don't know.
I can type with my eyes close.
It usually comes out better than with my eyes open.
Isn't that a b***h?
I don't know.
I can't take it anymore.
I'm going to do something.
Maybe I'll finish some anime, and then start a new show.
Maybe I'll finish Breaking Bad and start some new manga.
I don't know.
I can barely keep my eyes open.
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