Well the only reason I'm writing a lot in this journal every 2 seconds is because I have a lot on my mind, and I need to let a lot of things out to let go of the past. I'm trying to be a better person I really am. :'( I'm not really good at it, the only bad part about me, is that I can't handle being mean to strangers, but to family and friends...it's like no big deal? why is that? I feel like a totally horrible person and I like don't deserve to know the people I know. I take them for grated and I feel so awful.