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the past that connects to the future
Dear Jonelle
hey bud. wow time's been really flying, hasnt it? it was 2011 that i had met you on the alaskan cruise along with kara, caleb, amy, andra, joey, carmella, gabriel, jay - everyone from the teen's club. my only regret at this time is that i didnt consider how my actions or my habits would have affected you. i dont know wheither i've been pushed away because i was too clingy, if 4-5 yrs differences was too much, or if it was me who was doin all wrong. idk what i did wrong and i prob wont ever at this time. it has been my mistake to be impatient. and last year when you texted me believing i was your date to your first prom, i dont know if it was my chance to catch up or anything. if it was my chance to talk to you then im sorry for pushing you away. i didnt know how you wanted me to respond to it. if you texted me again i would have held on to it tighter.

whats been going on with me these days ... well im pretty happy that earlier this month i passed my drivers test! makes me super happy + parents got me a 2013 honda crv ex. brand new and i doubt i deserve it. but it's what happened. tho whats been bothering me now is the chance that my parents are going to divorce... this is something that i dont want to happen i mean sure they fight a lot but theyve must have married for a reason right? what worries me most is if it goes through wheres my dad gonna end up? cuz of my mom my dad has no money to his name cuz mom made him share a bank account together. mom gets paid more than my dad and w/nothing under his name idk where he'll be. verry worried about his health cuz u cant get good insurance w/22000 a year before tax's. and he's getting old and weak soon so idk how he's gonna get himself around anymore. my dad doesnt deserve this ... wish things were better with my parents...

im telling you, i find my mom crazy. she wants him to find a part time job at his age. like 60 or somethin. at his age its going to be hard for him to find one... and asking him to get over time? dude if he's getting weaker he's going to be worn out faster than he is aging. she wants him to not go out a lot and focus on the family? dude me and my brother are in college now my dad shouldnt be babysitting us anymore and my dad has a right to have a social life s**t. she's someone i wouldnt introduce you or anyone to - she's just rotten. she maybe nice at first but she strikes hard - nukes you - the moment she finds something she doesnt like or if ur not useful to her. i swear she doesnt have a lot of friends and the ones she does have she goes to only if she needs something - its stupid. like no joke. she honestly cant do anything on her own. i dont think many people like her. even at work a large portion of people dont like her. idk how she gets through the day w/o fixing how she is

me and my girlfriend have been together now for a total of 4 years now smilies/icon_smile.gif i'd say thats a bit something to be happy about at least in this hr. i find it stupid sometimes of how lucky i am to have her. i always find something about myself that would keep people away from me for one thing or another. im happy now that she just accepts me for whatever s**t i do/cause. i find it great that she's really able to look past it.

i can only wonder now as to how you are doing. only imagine how your couping with this new year as a sophmore. i remember how sophmore year was for me, especially with expectations. all i ask of you is follow what your heart desires. dont let anything distract you or stop you from grabbing it. "if you want something, go get it. period."

-Wtphu





 
 
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