I'll look after you.
I sit in the dark alone with thoughts and memories flowing through my mind and fish out a few that remind me that the world is indeed cruel. I still cannot get over the fact you aren't here, right now you would be defiantly eating anything and everything you could get your hands on this hour even though you were skinny as a twig. I remember one night when you were sticking Benjamin stickers you had found on your half of the our rooms walls that you got this intelligent (not so much) idea to get a bag of grapes and stick a grape in your belly button and pull it out just to hear the small popping sound. I remember looking over to you in dis-belief that you were seriously doing this. Your small precious giggle that can never be replaced filled the room. Another night you decided to order "Eye brow burner chicken" and we sat and ate that while watching movies enjoying each others company, which was an everyday thing. A month later you decided to try living back home with your parents which didn't last so long because you called mom at 2 a.m. crying that they were drunk punching your walls of your room. You came back to us again and everything was okay. We have many memories, More than I can count. We (Ma, Kenadi and I) would love to have you back, you have no clue. We miss you more than words can describe. I'm still not sure why God had to take you away from us. Never again will I have a mean bone in my body. It caused you to move out and onto drugs then lose your life. The excruciating pain I felt the day I saw your cold dead body on the road will never be covered. Pushing and pulling my way through the crowds of police men who try to hold me back, I finally get to you and hold you in my arms sobbing. Your warm blood covers my arms and clothing yet it doesn't phase me until I sweep your blonde hair away from your face. I can't believe this is you... The drugs have destroyed your beauty and innocence. The burns from the flames have melted you. I lay you back down. Police men lift me away from you. I can't fight anymore. I only have half of me now. My other half is gone. Due to being cruel to you. Never again will I have a mean bone in my body. And people wonder why I'm not mean...