Brain keeps thinking random depressing thoughts =n=' Shat up brain. Gawd i swear i'm going to become schizophrentic. -sigh- My nerves felt hightened today. I have every reason to be in an amazing mood right now. Body y u no happy? Or should i say brain? Is this a physical or mental issue. Bluh i dunt facking know.
I have great friends, an amazing lover, school is almost out, and school is almost out forever because i'll be a senior next year, i have good grades, i have so many great things to keep my happy like music anime, and all those great internet stuffs.
And here i am worrying im about to have a panic attack. =w= I'm like annoyed with myself. But hey maybe this is normal. Maybe all teenagers are just always panicked and fighting with themselves to stay positive =A= i find this hard to believe.
I mean what do i do. Do i smash this feeling down hide it away in the dark recesses of my mind? Or do i find some way to get rid of this and kill this feeling. Or maybe i just have to accept myself and be happy the way i am -rolls eyes- Too corny.
I would be happy with myself if it didnt make me feel so god damn negative. Oh god. God dangit. I sound like Holden. Eugh -headdesk- At least. I realize it.
First step of getting over a problem is realizing its there. Sad thing is i knew i was similar to holden in some ways. (For those who dont know, read Catcher in The Rye, Then i'll appear even More pathetic than i do now = w=~)
-sigh- maybe i just wait until this feeling passes. I am on my way out of puberty so this may be just puberty saying "Haha goodbye, i'm finally going, PSYCHE -attack-.. Ok now im done kthnxbye" Aw well, ill grow out of it, or get over it.
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