News stories don't upset me. The latest soldier who died in combat, the little girl that disappeared, the teenaged bomber. When I hear about these kinds of stories, I don't make much of it. "That's too bad." essentially.
There's this story around the buzz about a man in Ohio who kidnapped three girls in the early 2000s and kept them in his home. Recently, one broke free and they arrested the man.
And this story makes me deeply upset.
It's a very strange sort of upset. I'm not crying or getting teary eyed. I just feel bad. It's not good for me to think about it. So, I think I'll go into stream of consciousness and see if I can convey why I feel so terrible and why it's bad for me to think about it.
One girl was 16 when she was taken. She's 27 now. It's been a very long time since I was 16 and I'm 20. If I had lived that life, I would have 7 more years of torment.
How awful of this man to take these girls and use him as his personal sex toys. I think about them being chained and how routine his visits must of been. Like a tool of desire.
I think of what the first year must of been like. How after several months there isn't much hope. You've gotten used to what it is you call 'life' now.
I think about living in my hometown, in a house not too far from my own, knowing that my friends and family are so close. Thinking that maybe they will drive by this house thinking about you, and not even know how very close you two are. Like being trapped in a house right next door to your own..
I think about him cumming inside and what a despicable thing that is. I think about the miscarriages and the vomit. I think about the girl who conceived and I think about the 6 year old whose early memories are inside that house..
I wonder what kind of girl that 6 year old is. Is she nice and sweet or is she a daddy's girl? Does she listen to her mother? Does she think that the man is very kind and that her mother lies when she tells her that he is a bad man. Because when he is ready to do it, the girl is asleep and out of ear shot...
I try to think of hopeful things.
The ability to walk outside must of felt so terrific. Being able to call the cops and taken to safety. To be able to meet your family again. What a day of relief that must of been.
I think about how much life will mean to those girls. How an event like that can really change you. If they were reckless when they were taken, they are no longer. They have survived something that has aged them well beyond what they are now. They have learned to appreciate many, many things that other people take for granted. They will walk out a better person.
I wonder if they will be able to pass this knowledge down.
I wonder what the mother will tell the girl about her father when the girl has grown...
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