finals are stupid.

only studying for maybe an hour max on marketing. I hate that class (and the prof) with a passion. (how do I show this? I play solitare allllllllllll hour, and still get A's on the tests)

also working on the V. test for tomorrow. He has HARD tests, so you really need to know what you're doing when you study for them. For this particular class, he has an 81-page packet of his opinions of various topics in relationships, communication,etc.

A totally liberating feeling? Knowing that I can disagree with him.

Because I do. He is the very embodiment of this institution's values.

most of which I'm fine with. But damnit, I will be a public school kid 'til the day I die. do NOT tell me my kids are required to go to a private christian high school.

these people are so clueless, so sheltered. They're afraid of the "real world."


so that's my main point with him. otherwise, most of his stuff is really good.

I've also been having issues with another of my college's cultural twiks: the pressure to get married.


Seriously. If you see a guy and girl alone together on campus, you automatically assume they're dating, and that the wedding will be in a max of 3 years or so.

no such thing as guys and girls being friends here. and not "casual" relationships. When you're in a relationship, you are in it with intent to marry.

For me, a girl who's never had a boyfriend, this is absolutely terrifying. I don't want to think about marriage. I don't want to think about breaking up, either, but I don't want to have just ONE guy in my portfolio before I tie the knot FOREVER, for fear of "what if there's someone better out there?"


I have PMS soooo freaking bad right now.

The thought crossed my mind that graduation for my sister's class is going to be incredibly difficult, with Ma Bedel gone.

So, sat and cried about that for 15, 20 minutes.

Then stumbled across a videography wedding facebook thing (they did my cousin's wedding), they had a new video up (... i frequent their page once in a while... *cough*) and promptly cried at that.

and now a good song is playing, and I'm sitting here crying my eyes out for no particular reason.

well, kid's graduation should be interesting. last night I was thinking about it, and started reminiscing once again on my own graduation, and stuff related to it.

reflecting on old times.

old friends, old crushes.

the good times, and the bad.

And for a few hours on Sunday, I get to re-live that.

I can't decide how i feel about it.

No doubt it'll be awkward.

Probably be scared to talk to people, haha.

we'll see how it goes, i guess.