Today I booked a flight to Nashville, my hometown, that I've been apart from for a little over a year and a half.
It's very strange to me how sometimes a year can feel like a very long time ago and at the same time, it feels like it went by very quickly.
But that feeling happens all the time, to everyone, right?
"It's the last day of school. I can't believe it. It went by so quick."
But really it's not that the last time I was home was so long ago. It's more like my high school days were so far away. I graduated in 2010 and it's been 3 years now since I walked.
I know what I've been doing since then. I've done quite a bit, by my standards anyway. I don't feel as if I haven't done anything with my life. I think more that I've lived it the way I knew it would, which is at a pace that I'm comfortable with.
My best friend from youth sent me a friend request on Facebook today. I wasn't expecting it at all. In fact, I was honestly very positive that we would never again talk as friends. I'm not sure why I thought that.
We were so torn that I felt that even time could not repair what had happened. But I guess I was wrong. Which is good. From time to time I would think of him, and I would accept that I wouldn't really be apart of his life again.
I had a very surreal thought looking through pictures. I saw a picture of his room as I remember it. And it was so bizarre. At first I didn't recognize it. I thought "Who would have a Creatures of the Night poster in their room?"
And then I had this quick realization that it was his room, a room I spent years in. It was a funny experience that doesn't come over me often. I don't keep any pictures of my childhood with me. And pictures from that time of my life are pretty scarce.
As I went through more pictures, I saw some of my ex-girlfriend who I don't think about frequently, but had a pretty important role in my teen life. And I've looked through pictures of her before. She's changed a bit since when I was with her.
And then, for a moment, I came under the same spell. And I thought "I used to like this girl." and I thought about, and really came under the spell, of talking to her. It was brief and very odd. I can't picture myself the same way as the boy that liked her. For a small minute, I could get into those shoes, but then they came right off.
So I guess today is just full of old memories, huh? They go beyond what I usually think of has 'old', too. Because my high school days are so far behind me that I don't even consider them of the same type.
I called Kayla just now to let her know that I'll be there. She sounded very breath taken. Silly girl.
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