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Some free-write, feelings, etc. First journal entry was in 2006. hat's a lot of time :O
I Am Not Dead
yummy_smilies/icon_strawberry.gif Dearest beloved friend,
yummy_smilies/icon_pumpkinpie.png I wish you were here with me today. I have so much to tell you right now. You were my consultant and like a father I've never had. I went to where you used to live today and talked to your sister and her husband. Her husband told me you were going to talk to me. On that day, our basement was flooded and you just came back from your job. I knew you had asthma but I didn't know it would have worsened when you went to your new job.
yummy_smilies/icon_pumpkinpie.png I want to remember the good times we've had but even now as I remember today, these sad feelings creep in. What if I didn't go to school today? Would I have prevented you from going to your job? I am selfish. I want you back so much. I wanted to talk to you while I was grieving for my grandfather's death and watch him get cremated. I truly did not want to ignore you. It was selfish of me to ignore you and cry for my grandpa. If I were to turn back time, I would go back to February 27. It was a Wednesday. My dad was the last person you saw before you left earth.
yummy_smilies/icon_pumpkinpie.png Here's to the good times and the bad times. All of the times we've shared together are kept in my heart and in my memories. I've lost two most dearest and beloved father figures in the month of February. I know I'll probably never forget this loss ever but at least I know that I am alive and I'm proud to be associated with you and my loving grandfather. I'm not scared of death anymore because I know that both of these people will always be with me now.
Truly Always,
gaia_smilies/icon_crown.gif Momo gaia_smilies/icon_crown.gif

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