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bri's journal (:
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Stuart. Hmm. The boy I thought I loved so much when I was 13 - 14 years old. I mean, at the time, I thought to myself: how could we not be in love? Though we'd broken up SO many times, we'd always found our way back to each other. That was true love, wasn't it? Wrong. I think what happened was that we became so accustomed to each other that we thought what we were was right. In all reality, what we had was a platonic friendship encompassed in a relationship. Things never got even remotely sexual between us at any point, I felt so ugly when I was with him, and I don't think he even knew what he wanted. Sure, we were only in our beginning teens, but nothing was EVER sexual between us; I'd have felt more comfortable exchanging a dirty joke with a guy I didn't know than my own boyfriend. What the heck, right? As far as my looks were back then... Yes, I was terribly ugly; I'll admit the hell out of that statement. It was a miracle Stuart even agreed to be with me, so I thought. In reality, back then, I needed someone to tell me I was pretty, even though I knew I wasn't even slightly. Maybe back then I would have oozed of confidence. Huh. There's a quote from Marilyn that says "All little girls need to be told they're pretty, even when they're not." It's true. As far as him not knowing what he wanted, it was always me being the romantic one. I pretty much played the role of the guy. I mean, isn't the guy supposed to say the girl looks beautiful and throw a romantic one-liner at her, like, at least once a week or some s**t? Yeah, I was the only one doing that. Needless to say, our relationship ended when we realized we both had anger management issues and we just couldn't stand to be together anymore. That was probably the best decision relationship-wise I've ever made. Now, we remain friends, and friends forever only. I honestly think we were just two confused kids who became best friends and got thrown into a relationship together somehow. Later, I'd found out what some people were saying had been true; he had faked his pictures and admitted to it. Deep down, I always knew. I'm just glad he had the balls to tell me, instead of the classic "oh, that was my brother's friend's uncle's cousin" or some s**t. I like that he's been real ever since we broke up.

P.S. A picture will be included later; I'm on my phone, so I can't paste from Photobucket.





 
 
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